IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people think that it is more beneficial to take part in sports which are played in teams, like football. But others think taking part in individual sports is better, like swimming. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #part #sports #teams #football
In
this
 modern society, exercising and training have become important matters for most
people
 since everyone is up to their eyeballs at work. Today, some
people
 believe that
team
sports
 are more beneficial while
others
 think that individual
sports
 are better. In
this
 essay, I will discuss both views and give my opinion.
To begin
 with, it is common knowledge that practising any kind of sport in any way has its own benefits.
Team
sports
 ,on the one hand, help folks to learn about the advantages of teamwork and making new friends.
Moreover
, training with
others
 is more enjoyable and
also
 encourages
people
 to try harder and better.
For example
, consider a football
team
 that has a match to play. They train together, hang out together, and share many things with each other that makes their bond stronger and help them in their competitions.
On the other hand
, individual
sports
 are
also
 useful and help folks to reduce the risk of any health issues.
Although
, individual
sports
 reduce the chances of training as a group and with
others
 but provide a possibility for
people
 to be self-reliant.
Hence
, those who choose individual
sports
 have an opportunity to train anywhere and anytime without the participation of
others
.
For instance
,if someone has to work in an office all day and they only have free time before dinner, they can go to the gym and exercise alone on their own unlike group
sports
 which require many players and it is difficult to coordinate with them. In a nutshell, there is not any doubt that both these views have their own pros and cons. Despite the fact that both group and individual
sports
 are helpful for our health but I believe that
team
sports
 are more joyful because have an opportunity to play and train along with your friends.
Submitted by mohaghegharshia79 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: