Workers often retire at the age of 60 or 65. However, some people say that they should be allowed to continue working as long as they want. What is your opinion on this?

Some argue that people should be allowed to continue beyond the
retirement
age
while others counterargue that they should retire. In my opinion, I strongly agree with the latter view
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and
also
believe that any extension beyond the current
age
of
retirement
would invariably carry more negative effects than benefits for individuals and societies.
To begin
with, among the many reasons for having upper
age
limit for employment, reducing working capacity when humans
age
is the leading reason. The physical stamina, mental clarity, and sharpness of the senses start to decline after a certain
age
. For ,instance older
workers
would fall sick more often than younger
workers
, leading to less productivity.
Thus
, companies should employ
Correct article usage
a
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younger working force, in order to be successful.
Secondly
, society bares the responsibility to create job opportunities for
school-leavers
Correct your spelling
school leavers
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. The job market is already limited.
Furthermore
, If elderly
workers
continue to occupy their positions, there won't be opportunities to recruit the younger generation. Unemployment among school leavers has created many issues
such
as addiction to drugs,
a
Correct word choice
and a
show examples
rise in crime.
On the other hand
, one's who support extending the
retirement
age
based their argument on the fact that older
workers
are wiser and more experienced compared to new recruiters who are naive and inexperienced. It is indeed a loss to the workplace when an experienced worker is released from the job. On the
,
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apply
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contrary I feel
this
argument is baseless, because, unless the youngsters are given the opportunity to gain experience, there would not be any experienced
workers
in the future. In conclusion,I oppose the changes in the
retirement
age
because it would create an imbalance in the current structure.
Submitted by ghm_day on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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