Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists, but not local people. Why this is the case? What can be done to attract more local people to visit these places?

#museums #sites #tourists #people #case #visit #places

It can seen be that many people prefer to visit

places

such

museums

and monuments which are far from their hometown.

This

is because they already know about their local history and they love to go to the

places

they have not seen yet and are curious to visit there.

This

essay

put

Verb problem

sheds

show examples

light on the measures that authorities can take to entice the

residents

toward these sites. To commence with, everyone ignores the things that they already know about like local history. The foremost reason is,

people

Correct word choice

that people

show examples

already studied about old culture during their schooling,

therefore

, they are visiting the farthest

places

rather than going to the city museum. To explain, many

museums

have old paintings and artworks on the walls which can usually

find

Wrong verb form

be found

show examples

in the newspapers and books.

As a result

residents

feel that it will be

wasting

Wrong verb form

a waste

show examples

of time if they go to the

museums

and historical sites.

Hence

, they choose to travel outside the country. There

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

a number of steps that can be taken by the local authorities to tackle

this

problem.

Firstly

, implementing new technological equipment in the

museums

and monuments

such

as laptops and iPods can lure the local masses. To illustrate, the way in which information is delivered is getting old.

Thus

, implementing new methods of representation with the same antique resources and materials, cannot stop the

residents

to come

Change preposition

from coming

show examples

to the monuments.

Therefore

, it is essential to involve the latest technology in traditional

places

. In conclusion, people always prefer to approach

places

where they have not been in their

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

so that a few technological-related changes can attract a majority of

residents

Submitted by inderatwal1996 on Sat Oct 08 2022

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coherence cohesion

Improve the logical structure of the essay. Make sure that the introduction and conclusion are clearly present and reflect the content of the essay. Use relevant examples to support your points more effectively.

task achievement

Ensure that the essay fully addresses the task question. Provide clear and comprehensive ideas with relevant and specific examples to support your points.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

273 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists, but not local people. Why this is the case? What can be done to attract more local people to visit these places?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people tend to buy products or get services instantly, without waiting. Why is it happening? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Some people say that the government should pay money for large pieces of art, like sculptures for public display in outdoor places. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

More and more students choose to move to other countries to study their higher education. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?

Should students choose a university major that prepares them for high-paying careers. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Global warming is one of the most serious issues that the world is facing today. What are the causes of global warming and what measures can governments and individuals take to tackle the issue?