In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
İn some cultures,young people are taught that if they want to achieve something,they must
first
Linking Words
do it themselves.
This
Linking Words
essay agrees that
children
Use synonyms
working or studying will benefit their future.
First
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
essay discusses the beneficial side of making
children
Use synonyms
act for themselves,and
secondly
Linking Words
,the negative side of
this
Linking Words
situation. On the one hand,there are many benefits of
children
Use synonyms
fighting for themselves.Showing them the difficulties from their childhood is not only the benefit of that age but
also
Linking Words
for society.Accustoming a child to a difficult task is very beneficial for our future development.
For example
Linking Words
, according to studies,teaching a person to knit from a young age causes various problems.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,exposing
children
Use synonyms
to adversity can change their outlook on life.İn addition,the child thinks that it is necessary to do a hard way to get out of trouble.Some people want to find happiness in the right way because they grew up in hardship,while others draw the wrong conclusion from it.
For example
Linking Words
,according to statistics,most of the crimes currently occurring are committed by people who grew up in poverty. İn the end,some
children
Use synonyms
want to study more after seeing the absence.İn my opinion,it is useful to treat
children
Use synonyms
according to their behaviour.
Submitted by Premium Version on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • achieve
  • try hard
  • positive mindset
  • self-belief
  • motivates
  • ambitious goals
  • resilience
  • determination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • failure
  • effort
  • hard work
  • seek support
  • individual differences
  • abilities
  • capabilities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: