QUESTION : IN SOME PLACES, OLD AGE IS VALUED, WHILE IN OTHER CULTURES YOUTH IS considered MORE important.Discussion both views and give your opinion.

Valuing
elder
Correct article usage
the elder
show examples
generation
, and
younger
Add an article
the younger
show examples
generation
is varied with situation, and place. Some
countries
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the earth give importance to their aged
people
, and some states prioritized their young
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
. I completely agree with the
later
Correct your spelling
latter
show examples
view. In
this
essay, I am going to explain, why old
people
are valuable, and why youngsters are necessary. To commence with, some nations know the significance of
elderly
Correct article usage
the elderly
show examples
population
because they have enough experience regarding almost everything. To elaborate, the expertise of
Add a hyphen
grey-headed
show examples
grey headed
Add a hyphen
grey-headed
show examples
people
has been assisting for thousands of
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
.
For example
, Japan is very careful about
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
senior citizen
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and aided them with money, and proper treatment. The government of Japan believe that without the expertise, and experience of old
people
, they can not establish in every sector.
Thus
, Japan emphasized their older age group,
this
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
resulted in economical development.
However
, without the working ability, and modern technological knowledge of
younger
Correct article usage
the younger
show examples
generation
, no
countries
in the world are able to reach
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the peak of success. Turning to the other side of
argument
Add an article
the argument
an argument
show examples
, many
countries
in the world
very
Add a missing verb
are very
show examples
aware
regarding
Change preposition
of
show examples
their younger
generation
as they are able to work hard, and
familiar
Add a missing verb
are familiar
show examples
with cutting-edge technology. To clarify,
younger
Correct article usage
the younger
show examples
population
contributes
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
different sectors of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society through their operational skill
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
modern technology, advanced knowledge, and
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
energy.
For example
, in India,
IT
Correct article usage
the IT
show examples
sector share more than thirty
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
of their GDP, which is totally impossible without the help of youngsters.
Hence
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
of several
countries
valued their younger
population
to boost their overall development. To conclude,
people
of some states nurtured their
Add a hyphen
grey-headed
show examples
grey headed
Add a hyphen
grey-headed
show examples
population
because they are vital in terms of experience,
although
others argue that young
people
are pivotal due to their
hard working
Add a hyphen
hard-working
show examples
ability, and expertise in developed technology.
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • wisdom
  • experience
  • tradition
  • history
  • innovation
  • energy
  • perspectives
  • progress
  • modernization
  • economic growth
  • healthcare
  • retirement costs
  • balancing strengths
  • creativity
  • essential support
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