Buying things on the internet, such as groceries, books and air tickets is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping this way outweigh the disadvantages.

The beam of today's
world
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is based upon
science
and
technology
.
Therefore
, it is natural for an engineer or any
science
enthusiast to be more valuable than any artist. I believe
this
statement to be partially true, as art has its own place and value. At the rate, at which
this
world
is progressing. The
world
will need more engineers and technically
sounded
Change the form of the verb
sound
show examples
people
to maintain
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
stability, and help the
world
to prosper.
Science
is basically a tool that helps in discovering new things or creating new things to make life easier.
People
are so busy with their life and career that they hardly have time to listen to
music
or watch
Add an article
the film
a film
show examples
film
Fix the agreement mistake
films
show examples
.
Therefore
making
them
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
second
Correct article usage
the second
show examples
important
Correct quantifier usage
most important
show examples
thing in the
world
after
science
.
People
can survive without
music
, but they will still need
technology
for their survival.
For example
, due to
contamination
Correct article usage
the contamination
show examples
of water resources,
people
are using water purifiers to clean up
water
Add an article
the water
show examples
and make it safe for drinking. A feat, which can only be achieved by
science
, and not by any form of art.
Thus
making
Scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
Scientists
show examples
and Engineers more valuable than artists.
Thus
, in comparison with
music
, technical stuff still holds the higher ground. But that's not true
everytime
Replace the word
every time
show examples
.
For example
, even today after a hard day at work,
people
listen to
music
, watch
Add an article
the film
a film
show examples
film
Fix the agreement mistake
films
show examples
, play video games, etc. To ease
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their mind from all stress and find some relief. So even though
science
and
technology
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
important
music
will always have its place. So in my opinion, even though
this
modern age
run
Correct subject-verb agreement
runs
show examples
on the wheel of
science
and
technology
, art and
music
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
still important as it helps the person to feel relaxed so that they can focus on their job well.
Submitted by aryanyadav4709 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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