IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Education for young people is important in many countries. However, others think government should spend more money for education in adult population who cannot read and write. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In many nations, schooling is
an
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apply
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essential
to
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apply
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source
Add an article
the source
a source
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 of  youngsters’ life. And other believe that the
government
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 ought to spend
lots
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 of
money
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 on
an unknowable adolescents
Correct the article-noun agreement
unknowable adolescents
an unknowable adolescent
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 who cannot read and write well. I completely agree with
this
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 view and think that authorities should spend more
money
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 on unknowable
adults
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, because they may be well-qualified and important people who can be useful to society.
First
Linking Words
 of all, I believe that by spending too much
money
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 on the
education
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 of adolescents who do not have
lots
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 of knowledge, the
government
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 can make them well-educated people during the academic year.
This
Linking Words
 way
,
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apply
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 can show its good result for the
country’s
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 budget and
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country’s
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country
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 development if they spend
lots
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 of
money
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 on adult
education
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.
For example
Linking Words
, in the USA,
government
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 spend way more
money
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 and always to be attentive to adolescents’ teaching,
as a result
Linking Words
 of these things
this
Linking Words
country’s
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education
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 system possesses a high rank among the too many counties.
Thus
Linking Words
, we should be attentive and spend too much
money
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 on
adults
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’ schooling, in order to them to be up-and-coming people duration of their life.
Second
Linking Words
 of all, if authorities spend too much
money
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 on unknowable
adults
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'
education
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 after  they might see excellent results.
In other words
Linking Words
, if
government
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 spend a myriad amount of
money
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 afterwards adolescents try to change from an unknowable position to the right
ones
Correct your spelling
one
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. Take an example, in Australia,
Use synonyms
adults’
Change noun form
adults
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 teaching method was poor quality after their
government
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 spend a large amount of
money
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 on their
education
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 and
then
Linking Words
 almost all students were able to write and read as well and
this
Linking Words
 thing good affected
this
Linking Words
country’s
Use synonyms
 development.
Therefore
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, authorities ought to spend myriad amounts of
money
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 on their poor-quality
adults
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. To conclude, I believe that
government
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 should spend
lots
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 of
money
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 in order to increase the knowledge of unknowable
adults
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 after they can affect to
country’s
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 progress.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • education
  • young people
  • government
  • money
  • adult population
  • read
  • write
  • development
  • nation
  • improve
  • quality of life
  • investing
  • reduced
  • poverty
  • income inequality
  • funds
  • balancing
  • budget allocation
  • crucial
  • equal access
  • opportunities
  • promoting
  • literacy
  • numeracy
  • positive effects
  • society
What to do next:
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