IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

ome people say it is important to protect all wild animals. Others, however, say it is only important to protect some wild animals, not all of them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Wildlife
protection
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 has become an important environmental issue in the modern world. Some people believe that every wild animal deserves
protection
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,
while
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 others argue that only certain
species
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 should be preserved. In my opinion,
although
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 limited resources must be used wisely, protecting all wild
animals
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 should be the general aim.
This
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 essay will discuss both views before explaining why broad conservation is the better approach. On the one hand, those who
support
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 protecting only some
animals
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 believe that conservation should focus on the most valuable or endangered
species
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.
For example
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, governments may prioritise tigers, elephants, or blue whales because they are rare, iconic, and important for tourism. Since money, land, and expert
support
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 are limited, trying to save every
species
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 may seem unrealistic.
Therefore
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, selective
protection
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 can appear practical when urgent decisions must be made.
On the other hand
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, protecting all wild
animals
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 is important because every
species
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 has a role in the ecosystem.
For instance
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, insects, birds, predators, and marine creatures all contribute to food chains, pollination, population control, or soil and ocean health. If humans protect only attractive or famous
animals
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, they may ignore smaller
species
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 that are equally necessary for ecological balance.
As a result
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, wider conservation is essential for maintaining the natural systems on which people
also
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 depend. In conclusion, some people
support
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 selective
protection
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 because resources are limited and certain
species
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 face immediate danger.
However
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, I believe all wild
animals
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 should be protected as far as possible because ecosystems depend on the survival of many different
species
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. Governments should
therefore
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 prioritise endangered
animals
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while
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also
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 preserving habitats that
support
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 wildlife as a whole.

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task response
For task response, your answer covers both sides and your own view. To get a higher score, add one more clear idea for each side.
task response
For task response, your examples are good but a bit general. Use one more real or clear example to make your ideas stronger.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay is easy to follow and the order is clear. To improve, link some ideas in a more natural way, not only with simple words like 'for example' and 'therefore'.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, each body part has one main idea, which is good. To get a higher band, you can develop each main point a little more.
task response
You answer all parts of the question and give your opinion clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, two body parts, and a clear end.
task response
Your main ideas are relevant and easy to understand.
coherence and cohesion
The linking between parts is clear, so the reader can follow your thinking.
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