IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer.

#people #museums #art #galleries #objects #works #computer
The majority of people think that
,
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apply
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 having
the
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halls and salons are not
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useful
usefull
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useful
 rather than to enjoy with
art
 on the internet. From my point of view, it is the perfect to
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acquire
aquire
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acquire
 the
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text
texn
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text
 on the social network. In
this
,
essay
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an essay
the essay
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 I will discuss
the
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apply
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both viewpoints in a depth.
Nowdays
Correct the word
Nowadays
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 we are living in
the
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a
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 world where
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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technology
texnology
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technology
 is well developed, so
that
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apply
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it
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creates
creats
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creates
 perfect
condition
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conditions
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 for education too.
The
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A
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 number of people
prefer
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prefers
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 to search the text about
the
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apply
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ancient items on
the
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apply
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browsers
instead
 of going to the museum and
relax
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relaxing
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 with
art
 in real life
,
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 because
this
 way is
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admitted
admited
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admitted
 as
Add an article
a more
the more
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more
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a more
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 comfortable type of knowledging without any movements.
For example
,
image
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imagine
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 yourself, you are the person who is
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really
realy
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really
 interested in history and you
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crazy
craizy
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are craizy
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aboutm
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about
 the museum visiting, you have reached almost all
art
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the art
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gallereys
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galleries
 in your location except one, you do not have any money because the ticked
costs
Add a verb
arecosts
werecosts
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 very expensive, but at that time you have
a
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an
show examples
intetnet
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internet
trafic
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traffic
 on your phone, that means you able to go that place with virtual
wsy
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way
why
wise
.
However
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,However
show examples
 some people
are not agree
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do not agree
show examples
 with it. They think that
,
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apply
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 the ancient buildings,
art
gallereys
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galleries
 and museums are more
prefeble
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preferable
 and common to learn. They confirmed that
,
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apply
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 the young generation
or
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of
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studient
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student
shuold
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should
to
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apply
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see
the
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apply
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history with their own eyes and
to
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apply
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feel the
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atmosphere
atmospere
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atmosphere
 of that
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period
periode
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period
which
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in which
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 they are going to study. In conclusion, the
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individuals
individual
induviduals
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individuals
 should
to
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apply
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go on the modern steps of education and get more information by choosing the best option.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • virtual
  • digital
  • online
  • accessibility
  • inclusivity
  • cultural heritage
  • physical experience
  • immersion
  • local tourism
  • economy
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