IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

All education and healthcare should be funded by the government and free for everyone. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#education #healthcare #government
It is widely believed that scholarship and medical costs should be funded by the government and free for residents.
However
, some
people
 think that the authorities should not provide
education
 fees and healthcare fees for everyone. I acquiesce to
this
 view because it brings a lot of benefits to
people
. In the other words, sponsoring everyone will help them have better livings quality.
For instance
, orphans can go to school and poor
people
 do not worry about testing their health if all
education
 and healthcare are free.
Furthermore
, countries are developing more and more, which means the tuition fees and hospital expenses are higher than before so
people
 can not afford to pay for their own life. Apart from that, underprivileged children will not have any basic knowledge or a
second
 chance to secure their future.
For example
, Vietnamese beggars have to live on the road, sleep on chairs, and find food in the bins and their children can not study like the others nor go to the hospital when they are injured. It can be said that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 both
education
 and healthcare are the main factors to improve the development of the country. If everybody is not studying, the country will become from bad to worse and
people
 have to live with sickness when they do not go to the hospital. For the most part,
although
this
 status quo has received many opposing opinions,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 believe that the phenomenon brings positive sides
such
 as free
education
 and good health conditions. So I agree with
this
 opinion.
Submitted by anhdp.odin on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: