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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In many countries, people buy clothes and choose hair styles according to the latest fashion. Why is this happening? Is this a positive or a negative development?

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Introduction
In many countries,
people
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 follow the latest
fashion
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 trends in clothing and hairstyles.
This
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 happens for several reasons.
Body · 1
Firstly
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, the rise of social media plays a big role.
People
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 see influencers and celebrities wearing trendy
clothes
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 and hairstyles, and they want to copy them.
For example
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, when a famous celebrity wears a new brand, many of their followers rush to buy the same outfit.
Secondly
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,
fashion
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 companies spend a lot of money on advertisements that make
people
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 feel they need the latest styles to look good.
For instance
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, brands like Nike or Zara launch seasonal campaigns, encouraging
people
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 to buy their new collections.
Thirdly
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, many
people
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, especially the younger generation, want to fit in with their peers and avoid feeling left out.
For example
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, teenagers often wear the same types of
clothes
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 as their friends to feel accepted.
Body · 2
This
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 trend can be seen as both positive and negative. On the positive side,
fashion
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 allows
people
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 to express their individuality. Dressing in a certain way can boost confidence and create a sense of identity. It
also
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 supports the
fashion
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 industry, providing jobs to many
people
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.
For example
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,
fashion
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 designers, models, and retail workers all benefit from
this
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.
Body · 3
However
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, there are negative aspects too. Constantly buying new
clothes
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 to follow trends can be expensive and lead to financial stress.
Additionally
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, fast
fashion
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 contributes to environmental problems,
such
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 as waste and pollution.
People
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 often buy
clothes
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 they wear only a few times, which is not sustainable.
Conclusion
In conclusion, following
fashion
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 trends is a mix of both good and bad.
While
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 it encourages self-expression and supports the economy, it
also
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 brings challenges related to personal finances and environmental damage.
People
Use synonyms
 should try to find a balance between staying fashionable and being responsible.

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task achievement
To enhance task achievement, consider addressing opposing viewpoints or counterarguments more explicitly. This can add depth to your essay and show a thorough exploration of the topic.
coherence cohesion
To achieve an even higher score in coherence and cohesion, ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that transitions between ideas are smooth and varied.
task achievement
The essay includes relevant and specific examples, such as mentioning Nike and Zara, which effectively support the main points.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame the essay's argument. They help to provide a coherent and comprehensive response.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure is well-maintained throughout the essay, with each paragraph building on the previous one in a clear and concise manner.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • trends
  • influencers
  • social acceptance
  • self-expression
  • consumer culture
  • fast fashion
  • ethical implications
  • sustainability
  • innovation
  • economic growth
  • garment industry
  • psychological impact
  • creativity
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