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Band 2

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

#spite #advances #agriculture #people #world #case
In the modern world, agriculture is developing and doing
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 best.
However
, there are
people
 who struggle to find
food
 and go hungry. From my perspective, it is due to the high prices of
food
, and
low
Correct article usage
the low
show examples
salary
Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
show examples
 of
Add an article
the employee
an employee
show examples
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
. For the solution of
problem
Add an article
the problem
a problem
show examples
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 could do charity
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
 and make
Correct your spelling
programs
progrmas
Correct your spelling
programs
 to increase the number of workers. The
government
 is improving
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
agriculture,
although
,
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
show examples
 not notice the economical problems connected with poor citizens. Not so many
people
's earnings are enough to buy meals.
Furthermore
, the level of unemployment and homeless
people
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 increasing.
Thus
, a lot of
people
 can not afford any
food
 due to the lack of money. Obviously, to solve
this
 problem, there should be
balance
Add an article
a balance
show examples
 between
prices
Correct article usage
the prices
show examples
 of
food
 and
salary
Correct article usage
the salary
show examples
 of workers. For
this
, there should be
controlling
Add an article
a controlling
the controlling
show examples
 system, that
regulate
Change the verb form
regulates
show examples
 all sides.
Also
, the
government
 should allocate money to improving the amount of employee by doing some program, that helps to find
job
Add an article
a job
the job
show examples
 for
every one
Replace the word
everyone
show examples
. To conclude, agriculture and its advancements should be helpful to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
's life too. But if the
government
 do not do something
towards
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to
this
 problem, it will be big
problems
Fix the agreement mistake
problem
show examples
 in the future.
Submitted by Allazhar on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • inequality
  • distribution
  • access to resources
  • climate change
  • natural disasters
  • political factors
  • economic factors
  • agricultural practices
  • infrastructure
  • transportation
  • population growth
  • education
  • knowledge
  • food waste
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