IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think that the best way to improve road safety is to increase the minimum legal age for driving a car or motorbike. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #road #safety #age #car #motorbike
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Some
people
Use synonyms
 tend to think that the best way to improve
road
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 safety is to increase the minimum, acceptable
age
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 for driving
car
Correct article usage
a car
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 or motorcycle. From my point of view, I completely agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement, because
reduction
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the reduction
a reduction
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 of young
people
Use synonyms
 with
Add an article
a licence
the licence
show examples
licence
Fix the agreement mistake
licences
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 will stimulate safety. In the following
essay
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,essay
show examples
 I am going to give reasons and present other effective measures. One of the
first
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 things we need to take into consideration is that young
people
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most
Add a missing verb
are most
show examples
 likely to
broke
Change the form of the verb
break
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 the rules, mainly because of
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 unstable emotional background and lack of experience.
For example
Linking Words
, we can see the tendency of young
people
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 on the roads in Western counties, where the
age
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 of children who can drive a car varies from 14 to 17. As
it
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
known
Add a missing verb
is known
show examples
, at
this
Linking Words
age
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 children are the most hormone unstable, they tend to make compulsive decisions,
such
Linking Words
 as overspending, carelessness on the
road
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 leading to accidents,
Correct word choice
and weather
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weather
Correct your spelling
whether
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 older drivers are better at making logical actions in extreme situations.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 is not the only solution.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the government should invest money in improving the quality of roads, bridges, intersections,
signs
Correct word choice
and signs
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 in order to help drivers drive safely.
Secondly
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, putting money into
road
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 cleaning or heating, to minimise crash cases.
For instance
Linking Words
, during winter highways are getting slippery and icy, and collisions on the roads happen often. To conclude, I consider that driving
age
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 plays a huge role in
improvement
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the improvement
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 of
road
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 safety, but in my
opinion
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,opinion
show examples
 other measures are effective as well.
Submitted by oimigle on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • minimum legal age
  • road safety
  • cognitive skills
  • decision-making abilities
  • comprehensive driver education
  • unlicensed driving
  • economic implications
  • mobility
  • stricter enforcement
  • traffic laws
  • driver education
  • road accidents
  • mature and responsible
  • illegal driving
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