IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Homelessness is increasing in many major cities around the world. What do you think are the main causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to solve it?

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Society is witnessing an accelerated increase in the number of people living on the streets. Several factors cause
such
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 a tough reality, yet both governments and authorities could work together to tackle the problem. The prime reasons behind the increase in homeless citizens are, in my opinion, tough economies and the lack of social services investment.
For example
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, the impact of the pandemic event caused the fall of the world's economy and
thus
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, many people around the globe could no longer afford their mortgages. Once national markets started to crumble those without savings ended up losing their homes and
therefore
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, falling to indigency.
Additionally
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, when no support or social aid is granted, these families tend to lose all of their hopes and trust in the system resulting in their resignation to look for better future prospects. In order to solve homelessness, city leaders should include relieving tax collection and extending social services as a
further
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 investment
would
Correct pronoun usage
that would
show examples
 prove fundamental to preventing the problem.
For instance
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, allowing those in need to recover after a worldwide crisis could certainly make a difference in their personal economies which might result in the avoidance of getting evicted from their places. Specific circumstances would anticipate that those in lower income brackets could ultimately avoid the loss of property by stopping tax payments.
Additionally
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, investments attributed to social services could be boosted and extended.
That is
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 more personnel attending to the needs of inhabitants
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 suddenly could have lost their homes and were in desperate situations.
To conclude
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, even though a large number of factors take place in regard to homelessness, many measures can be considered to resolve the pressing issue. Tax relief and
further
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 social funding could be the answers that authorities ought to consider to help solve the aforementioned problem.

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task response
Your essay provides a clear and comprehensive response to the task, addressing the causes of homelessness and suggesting measures to solve it. However, the response could have been more specific and detailed, with a stronger emphasis on providing more relevant examples and evidence.
coherence cohesion
Your essay exhibits a logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion. Paragraphs are well-organized and connected, but there is room for improvement in terms of coherence. Ensure that each paragraph flows logically and maintains a clear focus on the main ideas.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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