Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
It is a common phenomenon that younger generations tend to overuse their smartphones. I think the reason behind
this
case is related to the improvements in technology. Linking Words
This
essay will demonstrate the necessity of its usage followed by an analysis of the negative impact on their lives.
The main reason for Linking Words
this
case is everything is connected to smart devices which are used not only for communication but Linking Words
also
for educational purposes. Linking Words
For example
, during the COVID-19 pandemic, pupils were urged to isolate themselves from communities and use phones in order to study Linking Words
as well as
communicate with each other. Since they were no longer able to meet in person at that time, overconsumption became undeniable and Linking Words
for
Linking Words
this
reason, the hours they spent online have skyrocketed. Linking Words
Moreover
, it has become an essential tool for communication Linking Words
due to
the development of social media.
Even though smartphones give us endless possibilities, it has several bad effects on youths. First of all, being online isolates them from their loved ones, Linking Words
such
as parents and siblings, and affects the quality of their relationships. Linking Words
Furthermore
, it encourages them to prefer hanging out with friends online, since it is easier and quicker than meeting physically. Linking Words
Secondly
, strangers with whom teenagers chat online are not always trustworthy, which can lead to a dangerous situation. Linking Words
Therefore
, taking a lack of real connection and the uncertainty of online chatting into consideration, I would say that it has negative results.
In conclusion, some children's usage of smart devices is out of line, which is often associated with the modern advancement of technology. Linking Words
However
, these improvements help us during harsh events, especially pandemics, depending on mobile phones is clearly negative for their well-being.Linking Words
Submitted by mongoliatg on
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Task Response
Your introduction and conclusion are present, but they need to be more engaging and comprehensive. Your main points need further development and support.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay structure is generally logical, but your main points need more support and development to strengthen the coherence of your essay. Work on providing stronger linkages between your sentences and paragraphs.