Some people believe that children should be banned from using their phones during the school day. Others believe that children should be allowed to use their phones. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

#people #children #phones #school #minutes

Some believe that pupils are not encouraged to

use

cellphone

Correct your spelling

cell phone

show examples

at school as it is considered a distracting element to their academic activities .

However

, I contend that

children

should bring

this

handhold

Correct your spelling

handheld

show examples

device to communicate and seek constant help under any urgent circumstances. In Vietnam, the

use

of mobile

phones

in class is totally prohibited. It is commonly seen that

children

listen to the teacher lecture while glueing their eyes to their mobile, by accident they divert their attention to the mobile phone and are deprived of obtaining the knowledge conveyed in the class. Over time,

children

will lack the knowledge needed to take the exam which results in low scores in academic activities. Despite the downturns aforementioned, I totally incentivise

children

should carry and

use

their handheld devices in emergency situations to ensure their highest personal security. My sister once used to be harassed and bullied by a group of students. Fortunately, she was able to call my father using mobile

phones

borrowed from her classmate which turns out to save her from a probable violent fight. I can't visualize what would happen if her classmate failed to carry the mobile phone.

Furthermore

, mobile

phones

can be an outstanding educational assistant when it comes to learning material.

For instance

, pupils look for ways and explanations to solve an equation online to help them better understand the lessons in the class.

Change preposition

show examples

this

way, they expand their knowledge of mathematics. For all the benefits that it brings about, mobile

phones

should be encouraged to

use

at school under appropriate situations to safeguard

children

and assist

children

in achieving more in terms of academics.

Submitted by minhthai191990 on Wed Oct 19 2022

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

275 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Minimize
Distractions
Prohibit
Cyberbullying
Inappropriate
Encourage
Social interaction
Educational apps
Safety tool
Emergencies
Responsible use
Balanced approach
Restrictions

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Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Topic: some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play\ with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the children of having a large number of toys?

In cities and towns all over the world the high volume of traffic is a problem.What are the causes of this and what actions can be taken to solve this problem?

Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do the advantages of the trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Some peole believe that tecnology has led to many positive development in their lives other think tecnology is gradually take over controlof the way people live.