Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphone. Why is this case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#children #hours #smartphone #case #development

It is no doubt that communication plays an indispensable role in the civilization of humankind. Without commuting successfully,

such

progressive technology is not achievable for human beings at the present

time

. There is a growing tendency for young individuals to their longer using

time

communicating with devices. In

this

essay, I will describe the main cause and which kinds of influence will

this

condition lead to.

First

of all, the reason which I believe primarily contributes to

this

phenomenon is the rapid development of technology. Born in

such

a hyper-connected world, advanced equipment has turned into a critical segment of daily life. A view in

this

point is the iPhone, one of the mobile phones invented by Apple. Compared to those senior people, kids who are so-called tech-innate are more willing to spend their

time

and energy on tech-related accessories.

Furthermore

, cyberspace contains vast quantities of appealing recreations. Youtube, a well-known video-sharing platform, contains a tremendous number of entertaining clips on it. With the aid of the network, it is effortless to access these just by typing in the keywords and pressing a few buttons. As aforementioned, spending

time

on phones can bring various pastimes into children’s lives.

However

, in my opinion, I tend to believe it exactly has some drawbacks.

Initially

, kids are too young to discern right from wrong. The fact is that information from the internet may be accompanied by detrimental factors. Take cyberbullying as an example,

such

situations which are harmful to youngsters’ mentalities can be found easily on social media like Facebook and Instagram.

Moreover

, exceedingly staring at the monitor may induce physical diseases. On account of blue light, which is emitted from mobile phones, can result in damage to adolescents’ eyesight,

that is

, myopia and retinal detachment. In conclusion, harmful effects unavoidably come along with long-lasting usage.

Submitted by ccgoabroad on Thu Oct 20 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

303 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

Engrossed
Distracted
Addictive
Digital natives
Virtual reality
Interactive
Online gaming
Social media platforms
Connectivity
Social engagement
Information access
Learning tools
Peer influence
Societal pressure
Alternative activities
Recreational facilities

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?
Recently, the number of households who have the desire to know about their house’s past, has increased. This essay will analyze the reasons for this interest as well as the ways which these individuals can follow to gain this information.
6.5
band
Many people argue that the Olympic Games have significant benefits for the host country while others believe they are a waste of money. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
It is widely believed that countries organizing the Olympic Games will gain significant advantages; however, there are contradictions regarding this view, as some argue that such international events are a way for countries to squander their funds. Although governments invest substantially in the Olympic Games, the revenue generated from the event is likely to be multiplied by subsequent growth in the tourism industry.
4.5
band
A friend has written to you asking for advice about a problem at work. You have had a similar problem in the past Write a reply to your friend. In your letter: tell your friend you understand the problem explain what happened to you in the past suggest possible solutions to the problem
How is it going? I would like to say you that I had the same problem as you. It is very arduous problem to solve. As I told you I will help you to solve this circumstances.
6.5
band
n spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?
Although there has been some significant development in the agricultural sector, there are countries that are still suffering from hunger. This essay will primarily discuss that the main reason for this starvation are global warming, civil wars and poverty and these can be alleviated by increasing co-operation and reducing social problems in addition to dumping excess food. The foremost reasons for the rise in hunger are also due to the increase in population along with lowering living standards. Firstly, the increment in the population density is leading to civil wars, the budget is not redirected towards either farming or finding ways to increase production, thus disrupting the continuous supply of food supply. Secondly, underdeveloped countries tend to prioritize manual labour due to a lack of money to purchase automated types of equipment which in turn slows down the rate of food production.For example, farmers in Niger have to carry buckets of water over long distances since t...
7
band
Some people think that the government should take care of disadvantaged people such as the unemployed and homeless people. What is the cause of the problem? To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Presently, the number of homeless and jobless individuals is in a sharp upward trend across the countries. Therefore, certain people hold the view that related government agencies should bear the responsibility to look after their citizens. I advocate the idea that furnishing their citizens with provisions in case of a need is among the utmost priorities for the governments.

Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphone. Why is this case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Many people argue that the Olympic Games have significant benefits for the host country while others believe they are a waste of money. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

A friend has written to you asking for advice about a problem at work. You have had a similar problem in the past Write a reply to your friend. In your letter: tell your friend you understand the problem explain what happened to you in the past suggest possible solutions to the problem

n spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Some people think that the government should take care of disadvantaged people such as the unemployed and homeless people. What is the cause of the problem? To what extent do you agree or disagree?