IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Studying with a group of students in a classroom is more beneficial than learning online at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#group #students #classroom #home
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many today believe that learning in groups, in
classrooms
Use synonyms
, has more advantages for
students
Use synonyms
 than studying remotely. I completely agree with
this
Linking Words
 sentiment, as studying in
classrooms
Use synonyms
, surrounded by
students
Use synonyms
 of similar ages and goals, helps to nurture important communication
skills
Use synonyms
 among
students
Use synonyms
 and
also
Linking Words
 helps teachers pay more attention to their
students
Use synonyms
. Good communication and problem-solving
skills
Use synonyms
 are an undeniable asset in today's competitive world. The way an individual communicates can be the determining factor between someone securing a well-paid job and someone struggling to find employment.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
such
Linking Words
skills
Use synonyms
 should be fostered in
students
Use synonyms
 from an early age. One way to do
this
Linking Words
 is to promote in-person studying.
Students
Use synonyms
 in
classrooms
Use synonyms
 are granted the chance to build strong friendships and navigate and solve conflicts with and among their peers and in the process strengthen their interpersonal
skills
Use synonyms
. these
skills
Use synonyms
 can
then
Linking Words
 be carried into their adult lives, helping them pilot through complex work relationships,
such
Linking Words
 as the relationship between work colleagues and employ-employer relationships.
Moreover
Linking Words
, group classroom studying provides teachers
to have
Verb problem
with
show examples
 a clear view of all the
students
Use synonyms
 in their classroom. Online teaching is largely done through video-calling platforms
such
Linking Words
 as Zoom, these platforms do not give the educator a clear overview of the participants of their classes.
This
Linking Words
 adversely impacts an educator's teaching, as expressions and body language can go unnoticed, making them unaware of when concepts need re-explaining. In-person
classrooms
Use synonyms
, where all
students
Use synonyms
 are in the teacher's field of vision, is a simple solution to
this
Linking Words
 problem. All things summed up, there are many advantages of studying in
classrooms
Use synonyms
, among
students
Use synonyms
, these
classrooms
Use synonyms
 provide a way for
students
Use synonyms
 to develop important social
skills
Use synonyms
 and among educators, it helps them by giving them access to their student's non-verbal cues.
Submitted by chanchaldubai1 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure & Development
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea that is expanded upon with examples and explanations to strengthen your argument.
Accuracy
Review your essay for small grammatical mistakes or typing errors to polish your writing. Minor errors can distract but didn't significantly hinder comprehension here.
Cohesion
Consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to ensure smooth transitions between ideas and paragraphs, adding to the overall coherence of your essay.
Task Response
Your essay effectively addresses the prompt, presenting a clear position and adequately supporting your arguments.
Coherence
Good use of paragraphing to separate ideas, making your essay easier to follow.
Lexical Resource
You demonstrated a good range of vocabulary relevant to the topic, enhancing the clarity and richness of your discussion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Collaborative learning
  • Debate
  • Discipline
  • Engagement
  • Feedback loop
  • Peer support
  • Educational resources
  • Adaptive learning
  • Self-motivation
  • Independent study
  • Digital literacy
  • Virtual classroom
  • Accessibility
  • E-learning
What to do next:
Look at other essays: