It has become easier and more affordable for people to visit other countries. Is it a positive or negative development?

Going abroad has become increasingly easy for
people
these days. I believe that
this
is a very positive trend. Visiting other countries broadens
people
’s views,
thus
enhancing their creativity. As every
culture
has its own stereotypical views and shortcomings, if
people
have experience of their own
culture
, it would restrict their outlook and potential to succeed.
By contrast
, if they are exposed to other cultures, they could learn new ways to approach tasks and
this
would encourage them to think outside the box, cultivating their creative thinking.
Moreover
, travelling abroad facilitates learning about other cultures because tourists can experience rich first-hand exposure, making their experience more interactive and engaging. They can communicate with locals and participate in their events or cultural celebrations, which can leave them with a greater and more in-depth impression of the
culture
.
Although
educational programs on TV and in books can
also
provide information about other countries,
this
passive way of learning tends to be more tedious for most
people
than actually experiencing the
culture
directly.
Furthermore
, with the increase in tourism, there is an increase in the demand for related services and products
such
as accommodation, transport and tickets for tourist attractions.
This
results in more and better employment opportunities, which means that
people
can find lucrative jobs and
therefore
earn a higher income, motivating them to purchase more goods and services. Both factors would contribute to economic growth. As discussed above, international travel becoming more accessible has multiple advantages.
Therefore
,
this
is a very positive trend.
Submitted by hbljy123 on

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Task Response
The essay provides a clear response to the prompt, discussing the advantages of the increasing ease of international travel. Make sure to address any potential counterarguments to strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The ideas are logically presented with effective transitions between paragraphs. Consider varying sentence structures for added coherence.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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