IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Almost every successful company is using advertisements to increase their sales. What features make an advertisement effective? Is advertising good or bad for the society?

Most of the
well known
Add a hyphen
well-known
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organisation
Fix the agreement mistake
organisations
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 are using promotions and marketing as the source of
profit
Use synonyms
 maximisation. The unique components
makes
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make
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 it reachable to
audience
Add an article
the audience
an audience
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.
However
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,
this
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 has several disadvantages. Which I have depicted in
this
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 essay.
To begin
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 with public attraction towards actors and
actress
Fix the agreement mistake
actresses
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. Because of fandom majority of individuals purchase products even though it is not necessary for the particular individual.
As a result
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 of
this
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profit
Use synonyms
 of the organisation rise significantly. For an instance, recently one of the famous
actor
Fix the agreement mistake
actors
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 Mohanlal acted for a premium ice cream brand "Skie" which reflected
as
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
 double in their
profit
Use synonyms
 margin .
Furthermore
Linking Words
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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people fall for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
alluring advertisements. Companies
exhibits
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exhibit
show examples
 their products
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such
Change preposition
in such
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 a way that
public
Correct article usage
the public
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 might feel they should have
Correct pronoun usage
them it
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it
Correct your spelling
at
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Correct your spelling
at least
atleast
Correct your spelling
least
 once.
For
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example
Add a comma
,example
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 Magnum is
ice
Correct article usage
an ice
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 cream brand when they introduced
this
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 product
because of
Change preposition
apply
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the outlook majority
citizens
Change preposition
of citizens
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 bought it
further
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,
it
Correct word choice
and it
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 became an addiction for the people like smoking.
Secondly
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,
Correct your spelling
certain
certains
Correct your spelling
certain
 things are sold only because of
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 uniqueness and versatility, an example
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
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 is
Samsung
Correct article usage
the Samsung
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 fold mobile which created a massive effect
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the crowd since it is the
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first ever
Add a hyphen
first-ever
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 smartphone which is foldable
man kind
Correct your spelling
mankind
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 had the tendency to purchase it on the very
first
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 day of its launch without even thinking about the price.
Nevertheless
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,
this
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 has significant negatives in comparison with prons majorly people are acquiring
produts
Correct your spelling
products
 which are not even necessary
this
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 may lead towards financial inconsistency among citizens. To sum up, the goals of companies are to sell products and make
Use synonyms
profit
Add an article
a profit
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 not analysing properly before purchasing a product brings financial problems

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • advertisement
  • effective
  • company
  • sales
  • attention
  • message
  • understand
  • connect
  • feelings
  • needs
  • call to action
  • memorable
  • slogan
  • product
  • brand
  • society
  • good
  • bad
  • increase
  • features
  • quickly
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