Some people say that zoos have no useful purpose. Others believe that zoos are beneficial in many ways. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is often argued that
zoos
have plenty of advantages, whilst others disagree and think it
Correct pronoun usage
they
serves
no benefits. Correct subject-verb agreement
serve
Although
zoos
can be prisoner
for Add an article
a prisoner
animals
, I firmly believe that zoos
are advantageous as it provides educational knowledge and entertains people
. This
essay will not only shed light on both perceptions but also
my point of view will be elaborated in the conclusion.
To begin
with, many people
believe that zoos
have no functional purposes but it is animal cruelty. It
is because Correct pronoun usage
This
animals
are kept alone in small areas. This
affects their mental and physical health. To elucidate further
, if animals
are isolated in congested area
, it results in depression and obesity as they Fix the agreement mistake
areas
longer
hunt for food. Rephrase
no longer
For instance
, a recent study held by a zoologist has shown that elephants are very sensitive animals
and they can die because of loneliness. Therefore
, giant elephants are prohibited in zoos
in China and in many other countries.
On the other hand
, zoos
play a vital role in entertaining people
. It is due to
the fact many animals
are thought to act funny so that they can entertain children. Moreover
, it serves as a place to educate people
about animal species and their characteristics. This
is because many zoos
have tour guides who give visitors in depth
information about their habitats and their unique traits. Add a hyphen
in-depth
Along with
this
, people
can see animals
and even touch them if they are not dangerous. For example
, in a study from 2010, Princeton University researchers found that zoos
are a great place to increase people
's knowledge about different animals
. As a consequence
, the government are building new zoos
.
In conclusion, according to
my perspective, zoos
are very important for people
's intellectual development. However
, zoos
should make sure to keep check on every animal to maintain their fitness and mentally healthy
.Replace the word
mental health
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coherence cohesion
The introduction lacks clarity and coherence. It is important to clearly state the purpose of the essay and provide a balanced overview of both views.
task achievement
The essay addresses the topic but lacks depth in discussing both views. It is important to provide a more balanced and detailed discussion of both perspectives and support your opinion with strong arguments and examples.
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