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Writing Samples
Band 6

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

#time #population #countries #adults #people #situation
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At the moment ,the demographic of some countries consists mainly of young people.
Although
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 there are some advantages because
this
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 is the productive age group ,there are
also
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 some drawbacks
such
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 as a lack of job opportunities, and increase consumption of certain items. On the one hand,it is true that countries with mostly young adults can be
an
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apply
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extremely productive
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
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.That
it
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is
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 because young ones have the physical and mental capacity to put up with the ongoing fast-paced world that we live in now.
in addition
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 ,they are more willing to take risks and experience new ideas ,possibly leading to a huge development .
for example
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,the inventor of Facebook,the biggest social network currently, dropped out of one of the most prestigious universities to dedicate himself to his invention .It was risky indeed ,but it changed the world .
thus
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,a young population often leads to
a
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apply
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great development worldwide.
On the other hand
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, having a country consisting mainly of the young leads to
increase
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an increase
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rate
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the rate
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 of competition ,resulting in
high
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a high
the high
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 rate of unemployment ,which in turn results in a financial burden to that particular country .
for instance
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 , in Sudan ,a country well known of its young demographics and high rate of unemployment due to the high competition in the job market ,leading to many Sudanese migrating in search of jobs. In conclusion,countries with a mainly young population can be advantageous in that they can use them to develop .
however
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 ,
this
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 can be unfortunate to some due to the high percentage of unemployment it can create.
Submitted by osama_elneel on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • demographic
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • innovation
  • skilled labor
  • social development
  • technology
  • dividend
  • competition
  • resources
  • social welfare
  • unrest
  • instability
  • healthcare
  • elderly care
What to do next:
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