Some people think that it’s a good idea to socialise with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it’s important to keep working life compeletly separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
People
have different views about what the best form of relationship among colleagues
is. While
some individuals argue that it is good to have a friendly relationship with the people
from our workplace, I personally agree with those who believe that it is essential to separate personal life
from professional life
.
It is true that being friends with your colleagues
and having some weekend gatherings with them could be delightful. To begin
with, The majority of people
spend more than ten hours at work
with the people
who they work
with. These long hours of working might lead employees to have deeper relationships with each other. As a result
, the staff tend to communicate friendlier and want to know their colleagues
’ families. Besides
, having a friendlier atmosphere in the office
might increase the work
efficiency. In that case, the employees see the company as their family, so they may put more effort in order to reach the company’s target. As a result
, all the staff would try harder because they have a sense of empathy regard to
their Replace the word
regarding
colleagues
.
However
, I believe that there should be a distance between private life
and workplace
Correct article usage
the workplace
due to
some reasons. Change preposition
for
Firstly
, it is not right for staff to make a decision because of their feeling toward their colleagues
. The evening gathering leads people
to have more than a professional relationship with each other. If two people
who work
in the same office
had a fight at one of the evening parties, the consequences of their manners would have a negative impact on their job positions. Secondly
, people
have to distinct
their emotions toward their family and their Replace the word
distinguish
colleagues
. A person must experience love and passion at home and spend quality time with his or her family. Spending a weekend far away from the office
atmosphere will help an employee to have a fresh start at the beginning of the week.
In conclusion, although
some people
suppose that visiting colleagues
out of the office
is a good idea, I assume that people
should detach their private life
from their office
life
.Submitted by Negar_seddigh on
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task achievement
Ensure that each main point is clearly supported with specific and relevant examples to strengthen your argument. This will add depth to your essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on refining transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs to ensure the flow of ideas is totally seamless.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which helps in presenting your ideas effectively.
task achievement
You have effectively presented both views on the topic and clearly stated your own opinion, which aligns well with the task requirements.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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