Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic: There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays? Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence
Music
helps people
to relax the mind
, forget sorrows and it make
Change the verb form
makes
mind
refresh irrespective of its kind and language. Correct article usage
the mind
However
some Add a comma
,However
people
believe that traditional music
is more important compared to the
widely accepted international Correct article usage
apply
music
. In Correct your spelling
my
may
opinion, Correct your spelling
my
Music
does not have language and one can listen and
enjoy any type of Change preposition
to and
music
according to his/her preferences.
Firstly
, some songs concur the people
's mind
irrespective of Fix the agreement mistake
minds
its
type. there are many local songs which Correct pronoun usage
their
is
widely accepted by everyone. Change the verb form
are
for example
, a
Tamil song "Enjoy Anjami" went viral all over the world, and Correct article usage
the
people
across the globe listened
Add the preposition
tolistened
this
song even though they do not understand the lyrics. This
shows that music
does not have any barrier
.
Fix the agreement mistake
barriers
Secondly
, people
who claim for
importance Change preposition
apply
to
traditional Change preposition
of
music
are worried about the extinction of the
traditional Correct article usage
apply
music
. They fear that people
will follow widely accepted music
and hence
nobody will be interested to learn traditional music
. However
, if the creation is excellent, then
music
will be accepted by Correct article usage
the music
public
. Add an article
the public
For example
, traditional African samba music
is getting wide popularity because of the creativity generated by the local musicians.
To summarise, Music
is about creativity and musicians need to focus more on pleasant and Add a hyphen
mind-blowing
mind blowing
creations. Add a hyphen
mind-blowing
This
will genuinely help to nurture traditional music
in the mind
of young
generation and Add an article
the young
hence
will also
become pride
to the country.Add an article
a pride
Submitted by bilujohn on
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