IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that a significant difference between a parents age and their child's age is a good thing. Do you think the advantages of a significant age gap outweigh the disadvantages?

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It is often considered few masses argue that the generation gap between
parents
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'
age
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 and their adolescent's
age
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 is beneficial. In my, an inclined gap between the guardians'
age
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 and
kids
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'
age
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 on depending personal choices.
Thus
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this
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 essay will elaborate on both desirable and undesirable facts. Analyzing the statement and explaining
further
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,
Firstly
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 some positive sides of a significant
age
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 gap,
parents
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 want to enjoy their life after marriage, so they can build numerous memories.
Furthermore
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, some guardians want to attain more success in life so they avoid having children and plan for their future wisely.
Besides
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, they want to provide luxury to their juvenile to so work hard.
In addition
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 to
this
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, some elder peoples are financially weak enough that they cannot afford child care
also
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.
Therefore
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, they want to be wealthy enough so they can provide proper amenities to their
kids
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.
For example
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, a survey conducted by The Times of India mentioned in their article that Indian maximum number of couples use to avoid early offspring because they want to achieve their goal in life and they prefer to do family planning before having a baby. Probing ahead, the significant
age
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 difference between
parents
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 and
kids
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 have some side effect
also
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 like
an
Correct article usage
the
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 understanding between family are quite less.
However
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, as
parents
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 became older they cannot work fastly and build a loss of interest in
kids
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. Moving
further
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, elder
parents
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 can get easily sick and juvenile do not know about health conditions it is difficult for them to overcome health issues. In a nutshell, according to the
,
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apply
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argument one can reach the conclusion that the difference between the
age
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 of
parents
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 and
kids
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 is good when they are planning for their future. But
parents
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 should have concerned about their children.

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • generational differences
  • emotional intelligence
  • financial stability
  • life experience
  • extracurricular activities
  • contemporary issues
  • role models
  • health challenges
  • guidance
  • parenting
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