Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements and this sets a bad example to the young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#celebrities #glamour #wealth #achievements #sets #people

It is undeniable fact that nowadays a multitude of individuals want to become famous.

However

, in

this

contemporary

world

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,world

show examples

there are celebrities

which

Correct pronoun usage

who

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are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for

accomplishments

Correct pronoun usage

their accomplishments

show examples

and

this

sets a negative example to the young

generation

. I agree with

this

statement to a maximum extent. In

this

essay, I intend to support my views before

reasonable

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a reasonable

show examples

conclusion can be drawn.

First

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The first

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and foremost step is that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

young

Add an article

the young

show examples

people believe that becoming a famous actor, artist or model can be an easy way to get affluent.

That is

all because of the fact that celebrities are showing off

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their wealth. To give an illustration, children see that some individuals become stars even without any achievements,

they

Correct word choice

and they

show examples

want to repeat after them.

Moreover

, people in society are

such

that they evaluate not the knowledge or talent of a person, but appearance.

Therefore

, many children think that

Correct your spelling

one

show examples

Correct your spelling

one

show examples

of the most essential qualities in a person is his externality. Probing

further

, it is evident that children and teenagers are the future of the country and society. But

those future

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that future generation

those future generations

show examples

generation

may ruin their own future. Because while youngsters are busy spending time on Instagram and TikTok and trying to

became

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become

show examples

famous, they probably may not notice their surroundings. While problems with ecology and

economy

Correct article usage

the economy

show examples

will occur in the world, the already growing

generation

of millenniums will be engaged in becoming rich and popular

such

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

as celebrities did. In conclusion, the most negative influence on the growing

generation

that has been had by public figures

which

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who

show examples

are well know

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are well known

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for their allure and luxuries is unemployment.

Submitted by Allazhar on Wed Oct 26 2022

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

273 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

glamour
wealth
achievements
portrayed
overshadow
influenced
lifestyles
unrealistic
expectations
values
promoting
hard work
perseverance
inspire
positive impact

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Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements and this sets a bad example to the young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many people believe that international tourism is a bad thing for their country. What are the reasons behind this view? What are the solutions to change it?

Some people think that the government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. Other people think that it is a fault of the parents. Discuss both side and give your opinion

Many people go through life doing work that they hate or have no talent for. Why does this happen? What are the consequences of this situation? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Since the 18th century technological advances have replaced people in the workplace. With today’s technology this process is happening at a greater rate. Technology is increasingly responsible for unemployment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

You recently sent some documents by post, but they did not arrive. Write a letter to the post manager. In your letter Give details of the situation Describe the documents Say what action you want the post office to take.