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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the average standard of people’s health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. to what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement. give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example from your own experience or knowledge.

#people’s #health #future
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One of the biggest challenges we face is the growing number of unwell nations in modern society. Some argue that the average level of health will continue to get worsened while others believe that
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 will be recovered over the period. Analysing the current result ever since emerging the industrial society, I strongly believe that the community will be unhealthier in the future. There are main two factors that are why nations think there will be more unhealthy.
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, with the disappearance of agricultural society, it is undeniable that now most societies have a sedentary lifestyle.
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,
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 of working on a farm, nowadays, the majority of public works in an office environment mainly utilise computers and phones. With these inactive and fast-paced lifestyles, the public need to spend time on work-out during their leisure hours,
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, a recent result showed that many population lack exercise.
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, with the unexpected encounter of the Covid pandemic, culture started working in
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home-based
office
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offices
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, which contributed to a higher obesity rate.
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, the government forced citizens to stay indoors due to the fear of spreading the virus in public areas,
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 they tend to watch TV at home all day
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 of walking in a park and cycling to work.
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, the significance of the death rate and severe traumas after the covid reflects that clearly people are not as healthy as before and
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 might happen again in the future. In conclusion, having advanced in medicine and technology, we expected to have better health.
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, due to the convenience they provide, most people take advantage.
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, people end up becoming fatter and less active.
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, unplanned viruses can affect us at any time so I believe that the standard of health will become lower in the future.
Submitted by amyheo92 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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