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Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people believe that the problem of illegal drugs can be solved by just legalizing all drugs. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

#people #drugs
Nowadays it is often considered the best way to control
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
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 of
illegal
Add an article
an illegal
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substance
Fix the agreement mistake
substances
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 is
Change preposition
by making
show examples
making
Change the verb form
to make
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it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 legal. In
this
 regard,
government
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the government
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 can play
its
Change the word
a
show examples
 vital role. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
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 I totally disagree with
this
 approach.
Hence
, in the following
paragraphs
Add a comma
,paragraphs
show examples
 I will elaborate
my
Change preposition
on my
show examples
 point of view.
To begin
 with, in recent days
large
Change the article
a large
the large
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 number of
young
Correct article usage
the young
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 population is addicted to drugs,
for example
, even they don't hesitate to smuggle
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 through the borders.
Secondly
, in many parts of the
world
Add a comma
,world
show examples
 some types of medicine like sleeping pills, anti-depressants and antibiotics can’t sell without
prescription
Correct article usage
a prescription
show examples
 because
right
Add an article
the right
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 dosage is crucial.
Consequently
, without taking it in specified quantity it can lead to death.
Additionally
, can bring many other consequences which will put
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
pressure on the health care system of any country and unwanted
expense
Fix the agreement mistake
expenses
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 as well.
Moreover
, it will be very difficult to control
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
crimes and drug addiction in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society which in turn will spoil the youth of any nation.
Furthermore
, some drugs have
medical
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a medical
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 use,
For example
, Marijuana or Ephedrine as FDA
proved
Correct your spelling
proven
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 their usefulness in heart diseases, epilepsy or improved concentration but it is the obligation of
Correct your spelling
policymakers
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policy makers
Correct your spelling
policymakers
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 to regulate
quota
Correct article usage
the quota
show examples
 system; only allowing the specified quantity according to the need of pharmaceutical companies.
Otherwise
, by legalizing it will be impossible to keep the check. In a recent survey done in Australia, it was found that 80
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
illegal
Change preposition
of illegal
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 drugs are taken by
youth
Add an article
the youth
show examples
 of age 15-28 while only 20
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of other ages are involved. In conclusion, I would say legalizing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
illicit products will only cause
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
harm
Correct quantifier usage
most harm
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 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society and youth the most.
Submitted by ammaramaqsood60 on

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