Do you think that education and training should be completely free or it is better to require fully paid tuition? Which way do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

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Some

people

are in favour of the way that tuition for education or training should be dispensed with.

However

, others suggest

people

are responsible for their payment for the study. As far as I am concerned, I prefer free of charge at the expense of learning in

school

People

advise learners should assume responsibility for spending on every item in

school

. After all, their decision to acquire knowledge at

school

must provide a comparable cost.

Moreover

, if everyone pays the money, the finances will become various

resources

at the

school

's disposal,

such

as the teacher's salary, teaching facilities, and so on.

As a result

, one organisation could advance better because of the support of

this

kind of income, not merely depending on the government's funding.

On the other hand

this

method which charges every student tuition could cause some

people

to do part-time jobs

due to

being devoid of means.

For example

, if

people

enroll

Change the spelling

enrol

show examples

in university, they certainly must spend a fortune on different expenses, and

thus

some of them can not help but struggle with

this

difficulty. As previously stated, I argue for the idea of free

resources

Additionally

, I believe every student has the potential capacity and it is beneficial for them to study and explore things without stress from deficient money.

Consequently

, if students have more time to concentrate on their assignments wholeheartedly, they might have better accomplishments and

furthermore

, they can contribute their intelligence, and skills to society.

However

, some

people

are opposed to free

resources

being used inappropriately, and it may result in inequity distribution. In a nutshell, these two situations have their benefits and downsides. As they say "There are two sides to every coin".

People

may reach success with the help of financial support and in turn help students in the next generation. It is unavoidable to have degenerate students abuse free

resources

However

, based on

overall

favours on average, I prefer to adopt free-of-charge learning cost.

Submitted by hayashidajinja820 on Sun Sep 29 2024

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suggestion

Your essay is generally well-structured and logically organized. However, it would benefit from more specific examples and clearer transitions between ideas to improve coherence and cohesion.

suggestion

Some of your ideas, while clear, need more elaboration and detailed supporting examples to reach a higher band score. Focus on providing concrete instances to illustrate your points.

strength

Your introduction and conclusion are well-presented, summarizing your main points effectively.

strength

You have a good logical structure and your arguments are presented in a clear sequence.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

325 words

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Do you think that education and training should be completely free or it is better to require fully paid tuition? Which way do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas.

The Vital Role of Banking in Promoting Economic Growth and Development.

Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both these views!