IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many people choose to work or live abroad because of the higher standards of living they can find outside their home country. Do you think this brings more advantages or disadvantages to the people who follow this path?

#people #work #standards #home #country #path
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A number of
people
Use synonyms
 nowadays are living
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 countries outside of their homeland. To somebody settling in a foreign country is a great deal while to others it is not worthwhile at all. Personally, I am in favour of the former and in the subsequent
paragraphs
Add a comma
,paragraphs
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 will be discussing my views.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, most
people
Use synonyms
 who
goes
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go
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for
Change preposition
to
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 getting higher studies in any foreign country find wonderful work opportunities there once they achieve their degrees while it is often uncertain to secure a job back in their homeland.
For instance
Linking Words
, many Bangladeshi students who came back from abroad after
Correct your spelling
completing
completion
completeing
Correct your spelling
completing
 their studies barely received job
offer
Fix the agreement mistake
offers
show examples
 according to their
qualification
Fix the agreement mistake
qualifications
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.
As a result
Linking Words
, they went back
to
Change preposition
apply
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abroad again and got themselves employed there
with
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in
show examples
relatively
Correct article usage
a relatively
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 easy and fair way. Another point worth mentioning is that most of the developed countries offer
secured
Replace the word
secure
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 life to the citizens which
work
Correct subject-verb agreement
works
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 as a major pull factor to the immigrants as very often these
people
Use synonyms
came
Wrong verb form
come
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 from countries that are
Add a hyphen
war-torn
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war torn
Add a hyphen
war-torn
show examples
 or are going
Correct your spelling
through
show examples
trough
Correct your spelling
through
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 economic crisis and so on.
For instance
Linking Words
, the
Rohingiyas
Correct your spelling
Rohingyas
Rohingya
 in Bangladesh who fled away from
Miyanmar
Correct your spelling
Myanmar
 due to the oppression by Burmese authorities are feared of going back there in their motherland. They feel more
secured
Wrong verb form
secure
show examples
 here in Bangladesh and
thus
Linking Words
 want to settle here permanently. To conclude, staying somewhere is a decision that
people
Use synonyms
 make mostly on the basis of life security and better job facilities and if a person
find
Change the verb form
finds
show examples
 it in a foreign nation
then
Linking Words
 that will definitely make their lives comfortable.
Submitted by barson.mithun392 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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