IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people prefer to work a lot, and spend less time on leisure activities. I think that this has more drawbacks than benefits

#people #work #time #leisure #activities
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Nowadays, people are taking part in the rat race
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the
Correct your spelling
money
many
maney
Correct your spelling
money
 earning, they are giving
lot
Correct article usage
a lot
show examples
 more
time
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
working than personal
time
Use synonyms
as a result
Linking Words
 individuals are becoming lonely and depressed. In
this
Linking Words
 essay , I will discuss, how
this
Linking Words
 development has
became
Change the verb form
become
show examples
 more
disadvantagous
Correct your spelling
disadvantageous
 than beneficial.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, maintaining
Add a hyphen
work-life
show examples
work
Add a hyphen
work-life
show examples
life
Use synonyms
 balance is quite important for all human beings,
Linking Words
otherwise
Add a comma
,otherwise
show examples
 they will be either stressed out or detached from the rest of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. For
Correct your spelling
overall
show examples
over all
Correct your spelling
overall
show examples
 development of an individual, someone has to distribute his
time
Use synonyms
 in an ideal manner, so that
someone
Correct pronoun usage
he
show examples
 can maintain his personal and professional
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
. If
Correct your spelling
someone
show examples
some one
Correct your spelling
someone
show examples
 only
think
Change the verb form
thinks
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 about professional growth and neglect personal, social and spiritual growth, in long run, he can be suffered from
psychiatric
Add an article
a psychiatric
show examples
 problem. Not only the psychological problem but
also
Linking Words
 can be affected by
other chronic disease
Change the wording
another chronic disease
other chronic diseases
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 like diabetes
melitus
Correct your spelling
Mellitus
, heart disease,
hypertension
Correct word choice
and hypertension
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
,
There
Fix capitalization
there
show examples
 are few people who are
workoholic
Correct your spelling
workaholic
workaholics
, they love to work
twenty four
Add a hyphen
twenty-four
show examples
 into seven.
Additionally
Linking Words
, activities related to hobby helps a
person
Use synonyms
 in their emotional growth, and improve
individual's
Correct article usage
an individual's
show examples
 creativity which is important for maintaining a happy
life
Use synonyms
. A
person
Use synonyms
 needs to distribute his
time
Use synonyms
 equally so that they can pursue their hobby which will help them to get rid of
monotonous
Correct article usage
the monotonous
show examples
life
Use synonyms
routine
Fix the agreement mistake
routines
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, an individual who loves painting
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
can paint in his spare
time
Use synonyms
 , it will give
Correct your spelling
him
hime
Correct your spelling
him
 a sense of accomplishment. To conclude, leisure activities
helps
Change the verb form
help
show examples
 a
person
Use synonyms
 to decrease boredom
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
life
Use synonyms
 and increase
productivity
Add an article
the productivity
show examples
 of a
person
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
 money is important, there is no doubt that money can not buy happiness, so to
being
Wrong verb form
be
show examples
 happy,
Add a hyphen
work-life
show examples
work
Add a hyphen
work-life
show examples
life
Use synonyms
 balance is necessary.
Submitted by ratnamalabej93 on

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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