some people think that government should be responsible for crime prevention, while others believe that it is the responsible of the individual to protect themselves. Discuss both sides give your opinion.

A highly controversial topic today relates to whether the responsibility for criminal avoidance belongs to the authority or the citizen. In
this
essay, I will examine
this
question from both points of view and
then
explain why I believe the accountability of leaders is larger. There are social activists who are of the opinion that the government have to be in charge of controlling crime. The main reason for believing
this
is that criminal law is constructed by the parliament which is
also
certainly responsible for its execution. It is possible to say that the police force is founded by the government in order to primarily
ensures
Correct subject-verb agreement
ensure
show examples
social security. A great illustration of
this
is the police may reinforce their manpower to increase hourly check-ups on every main street of a city to
early
Rephrase
apply
show examples
detect criminal signals
such
as thief.
On the other hand
, some politicians are convinced that the self-protecting obligation of the individual is more important. They often have
this
opinion because offence activities impact directly the safety of citizen and their relatives.
Therefore
each individual should play the first role of securing themselves when they encounter dangerous incidents.
For instance
, when someone copes with a robber, they should have the self-prepared knowledge to deal with
this
appalling situation to avoid injury. In conclusion, I reckon that both arguments have their merits. On balance,
however
, I feel that the government should play a crucial role in resolving
this
social matter.
This
is because they have professionals force who are well-equipped with skills and tools to face the offenders.
Submitted by Minh_nhatthan on

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improvement
Task Response: The essay addresses the topic by discussing the responsibility for crime prevention from both the government and individual perspectives, and provides a clear opinion. However, there is room for further development of ideas and examples to fully explore both sides of the argument.
improvement
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a logical structure and presents a clear introduction and conclusion. The main points are supported with relevant examples and arguments. To improve, provide more cohesive linkers between ideas and ensure a consistent flow of information throughout the essay.

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