In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is common in some cultures that people tell children that they can gain anything they want if they have enough struggle. I think it has both sides of merits and demerits and I will explain them in the following essay. Nowadays, in
this
Linking Words
competitive society, every child should learn that he
/
Use synonyms
she should be so industrious to gain
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
her
/
Use synonyms
his goals and it is true in every aspect of today’s life.
For instance
Linking Words
, if a kid wants to go to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
unique school, which has expert teachers and fascinating facilities, she
/
Use synonyms
he should struggle hard to increase her
/
Use synonyms
his scores to be able to be accepted in that school.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, if a youth does not use to be a hard-working person in her
/
Use synonyms
his childhood, she
/
Use synonyms
he cannot be a successful person in the future in some situations that need struggling.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, if we always tell kids that they will achieve everything they want just by trying hard, they become so depressed in the situations that they could not achieve them and they think that they did not struggle hard enough.
Otherwise
Linking Words
, we know in some situations, “trying hard” is not the only determining factor.
For example
Linking Words
, some of the children are sports enthusiasts and it is obvious that they want to be the winner in the competitions; but sometimes they cannot outweigh it and become
Add an article
a loser
the loser
show examples
loser
Fix the agreement mistake
losers
show examples
. In
this
Linking Words
case, there are a lot of factors that cause their loss: maybe the other competitor was really professional or she
/
Use synonyms
he has a better tool. (in some cases like bicycle competitions).
Hence
Linking Words
, if we emphasize
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
struggling for gaining
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
goals, we put the child in an illogical situation in some cases and it bothers them a lot. In conclusion, we should teach children that it is crucial for them to work hard on their wanted goals to achieve them, but it is necessary to notice that we should aware
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
that hard trying is not the one and only factor to achieve
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
anything they want.
Submitted by naderiazin on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • achieve
  • try hard
  • positive mindset
  • self-belief
  • motivates
  • ambitious goals
  • resilience
  • determination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • failure
  • effort
  • hard work
  • seek support
  • individual differences
  • abilities
  • capabilities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: