Schools are no longer necessary because children can get so much information available through the internet, and they can study just as well at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is thought that children don’t need to go to
schools
anymore because
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
availability of information online and the effectiveness of homeschooling is the same as learning at school. In my opinion, I strongly disagree with
this
as
schools
can provide
with
Correct pronoun usage
us with
show examples
so much more than just knowledge and homeschooling is only effective in certain cases. Not only knowledge
,
Add the word(s)
but,
show examples
schools
can
also
give students a chance to socialize and shape their morals. Unlike online studying, students get to meet people and interact with them face to face, which helps them get accustomed to
communicate
Change the verb form
communicating
show examples
with other people later in life. And as children interact with other human beings, they shape their own ideas of what’s right and what’s wrong, with teachers by their side
Fix the infinitive
to guide
show examples
guide
Change the form of the verb
guiding
show examples
them to the correct path and way of thinking.
Although
homeschooling has been proven to be effective, even more than traditional schooling in some aspects, they only grant benefits to learners with self-control and a sense of discipline. Only in that way can they utilize online learning and use it to the fullest.
On the other hand
,
learners
Change preposition
for learners
show examples
who aren’t hardworking and well-disciplined,
this
is a whole different story. They will neglect
studying
Change the verb form
to study
show examples
and turn to digital entertainment
instead
, which gradually
decrease
Correct subject-verb agreement
decreases
show examples
their knowledge. In conclusion, though homeschooling has
gain
Change the verb form
gained
show examples
considerable
Correct your spelling
popularity
popular
popularing
Correct your spelling
popularity
thesedays
Correct your spelling
these days
,
schools
will still remain relevant.
Submitted by bttha.qn on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • social development
  • fostering communication
  • personalized guidance
  • immediate feedback
  • replicated
  • structured environments
  • discipline
  • time management skills
  • extracurricular activities
  • nurture talents
  • inculcate
  • sense of community
  • shared learning experiences
  • equal access
  • learning opportunities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: