Some people believe that teenager should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time . This can be benefit teenagers and the community as well . To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is highly debatable that younger people should be mandatorily involved in non-paying
community
service
during their holiday or convenient time. I totally agree with the given statement above which I will explain with the example. By participating in
community
service
, It makes the younger generation more responsible for the reason that they're going to learn
differently
Change the adverb
different
show examples
things
such
as cleaning up the streets or joining up in charity events which
involved
Wrong verb form
involve
show examples
feeding
children
in orphanages.
For instance
in Canada
Parent's
Change noun form
Parent
show examples
always
encouraging
Wrong verb form
encourage
show examples
their
children
to participate in various
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
of events especially if it's promoting
conserving
Replace the word
the conservation
show examples
of Nature.
Moreover
, it
also
promotes a better relationship with their fellow teenager as they build camaraderie through the
community
service
they
participated
Wrong verb form
participate
show examples
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
.
In addition
to ,that it
also
increases their confidence to do certain tasks which they can carry on even
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
their own home.
For instance
in ,Japan they're actually exposing young
children
in primary school to do household chores or even
tour
Wrong verb form
touring
show examples
the
children
in some restaurants for them to experience how to work in that kind of environment,
This
is good because at a young
age
Add a comma
age,
show examples
they know what it feels like being responsible and obedient to their parents.
Furthermore
, being always present in
community
service
makes a teenager
developed
Wrong verb form
develop
show examples
their time management
skills
and a lot
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
the most significant things that make them a better version of themselves
as well as
enhance their
skills
not just technical
skills
but
also
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
logical thinking ability. In conclusion, It is shown that being involved in
community
service
makes the younger generation discover their
skills
and know
their self
Correct pronoun usage
themself
themselves
show examples
more and
also
spend their time on the most important things and be more beneficial to the
community
.
Submitted by jpineda032594 on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • mandatory
  • community service
  • empathy
  • real-world issues
  • problem-solving skills
  • social skills
  • networks
  • constructive
  • detrimental activities
  • college applications
  • job resumes
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