Some people think that competitive sports have a positive effect on the education of teenagers while others argue that the effect is negative. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Some individuals
argued
Wrong verb form
argue
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that
sports
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that require competition influence the education of children positively
while
Linking Words
others think that the impact is negative.I believe that the advantages of competitive
sports
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outweigh the drawbacks. On the one hand,there are a lot of benefits of competitive
sports
Use synonyms
for children's education.
This
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is simply because doing exercise helps teenagers in order to get fit.
Furthermore
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, competitive
sports
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will be more beneficial in terms of not only mental but
also
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physical.Mental effects will be much more effective.To exemplify my opinion,
according to
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psychologists sport has a tremendous impact on individuals' personalities,so it makes their character stronger.
For example
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,many athletes and players are more likely to be determined and persistent.
That is
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why it is irrefutable that teenagers will take
a lot of
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
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advantage of their literacy by engaging in competitive play.
As a consequence
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,they will keep up with their studies in spite of plenty of challenges.
On the other hand
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,numerous disadvantages
also
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exist.One of the main demerits of taking part in a
sports
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competition is getting injuries.It is undeniable that hurts are an integral part of
sports
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.As with many professionals,there is
also
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a likelihood for children.
Hence
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,it would be a reason to stay at home until they recover.
Consequently
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,they may fall behind in their studies.One explanation for
this
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,I was studying at school and playing judo simultaneously,back in my childhood
however
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it was difficult to maintain the balance of study and exercise even when I broke any part of bodies or got injured which is why I made a decision to halt sport from that time.
This
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is the primary reason for sport affects teenagers' literacy adversely.
To conclude
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,
although
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,there are plenty of cons of
sports
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in education like having a fear of deriving wounds, the merits are far greater because of the above-mentioned reason
Submitted by malikli.malik1995 on

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Task Response
Ensure that the examples provided directly relate to the points being made and always support the main argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Focus on improving the organization of ideas within paragraphs and ensure a clear connection between them to enhance coherence.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • promote a healthier lifestyle
  • valuable life skills
  • mental focus
  • teamwork and communication
  • time management
  • stress relief
  • neglecting academics
  • intense pressure
  • physical injuries
  • mental stress
  • time commitment
  • fear of failure
  • emotional well-being
  • academic performance
  • balancing sports and academics
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