IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Governments should spend less money on restoring old buildings and more money for new housing and roads development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#governments #money #buildings #roads #development
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With the development of the economy and populations that grow so fast nowadays, more and more old
buildings
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 are replaced by the new modern style constructions. From my perspective ,I disagree governments should spend less payment on restoring
old
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the old
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 property and more cash on new housing and road development while
i
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I
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 think they are both important that should be treated equally. On the one hand, with the crowd population have grown so fast,
firstly
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 ,
ministry
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the ministry
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 surely
need
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needs
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 to cost lots of
money
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guarantee
Fix the infinitive
to guarantee
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 all the family have safe and enough space
such
Linking Words
 as houses to live in, so that they could bear the unpredictable weather live comfortably.
Secondly
Linking Words
, governments are responsible for providing an efficient transportation network to satisfy the
basicbacis
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basic basis
 need for work or food,
for example
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 ,
public
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the public
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 would able to go out for work and purchase something which is necessary to
making
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make
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 a living on their own.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
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the authority
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authority
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authorities
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 should take action, like spending enough
money
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 to protect the ancient
buildings
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 which symbolize the identity of the local people or even a nation.
Such
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 as the Forbidden City experiences several empires it is not only obvious evidence of
unforgettableunforgetable
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unforgettable unforgettable
 historical events, but
also
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 records the ancient style of architecture which
definitelydefinetely
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definitely definitely
 needed to spend lots of
fund
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funds
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 to make great protection . every time people pass
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by
bybyb
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by
such
Linking Words
 meaningful old
buildings
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 , it could always
reminds
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remind
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 us where we come from so that
strengthensstrengthen
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strengthen strengthen
 our identity
recognitionrecoginition
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recognition recognition
 and show us how our ancestors live in the old ages . So in my opinion , some meaningful and safe ancient
building
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buildings
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 undoubtedlyundoubtly need to put enough
money
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 for maintenance or restoration by the government while spending lots of
money
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 on new housing or roads, since the old
buildings
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 sometimes contain many historical stories and the symbols of the nation which certainly can not be replaced.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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