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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some peope believe that nowadyas we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#peope #nowadyas #choices
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We live in an era with advanced technology, which gives
people
Use synonyms
 various possibilities. Countries and
world
Correct article usage
the world
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, in general, are developing and society is able to experience more than in the past, I have no doubts. Is it too much to handle? I would like to present my point of view on
this
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 topic.
Firstly
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,
people
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 do have many
choices
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 nowadays. There are more stores and products to purchase,
also
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 humans have more ways to buy material goods than their ancestors. Technology has made online shopping possible.
Moreover
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, it is much easier for us, as
people
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 to take part in different events. Anyone can find something they are interested in,
for example
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, we can attend art or historical exhibitions, concerts and a huge range of festivals,
therefore
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, we can learn about cultures,
history
Correct word choice
and history
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 and gain fantastic memories.
Furthermore
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, 21st century gives us a chance to travel around the world and visit
great
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a great
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 amount of places,
as a result
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, we can meet other
people
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, try local food and get familiar with their traditions.
However
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, diversity and variety of
choices
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 might
also
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 have some disadvantages.
For instance
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,
people
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 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern life have
an
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apply
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easier access to drugs, alcohol and other products, which can lead to addictions,
consequently
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, humans can ruin their lives and their relatives as well. Some
people
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 are more likely to suffer from addictions
,
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apply
show examples
 because they are unable to control themselves or they want to impress somebody. It can be dangerous and even lead to
the
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apply
show examples
premature death. In conclusion, I believe that
people
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 nowadays have a lot of
choices
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 but from my point of view,
that is
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 a good thing. It gives us, many possibilities, which we can use to educate ourselves. It certainly can cause some trouble, but as long as we know, what is good for us and we make good
choices
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, we should not worry.
Submitted by paulastb6 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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