IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In most of the society role of mother and father differs. What are the causes of this difference? What will be the parents role in future?

In
this
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 modern ,era the involvement of
parents
Use synonyms
 is extremely valuable in children's life.
However
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, I firmly believe that
parents
Use synonyms
 are the
first
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 teachers of their infants. Whereas,
this
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 essay will support the effects of assistance of
offsprings
Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
show examples
 and how guardians benefit them in the
further
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 life of their child in upcoming paragraphs To commence with,
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first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
 and foremost factor is mother is considered the most loving attitude towards her infants and she feels much responsible for their child to care for them and
try
Correct subject-verb agreement
tries
show examples
 to make
a robust bonds
Correct the article-noun agreement
robust bonds
a robust bond
show examples
. To elaborate
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
,
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
this
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 situation made mothers desperate to provide every facility and pampered
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their
baby
Fix the agreement mistake
babies
show examples
 until they do not get adults.
Moreover
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, when a person enters
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a job or any other occupational field as per their interest and did not get
conqueror
Correct article usage
a conqueror
show examples
 for their desires
this
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 will make them feel annoyed and
demotivates
Wrong verb form
demotivated
show examples
 a lot. To collaborate
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
this
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 may
also
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 generate bad ideas of
saucide
Correct your spelling
suicide
sauce
,
performing
Correct word choice
and performing
show examples
 illegal activities so here generally father
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
 positive and stimulating notions to make them rectify and again proceed
further
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 strongly. To vindicate it, in America most adult age
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
 are indulging themselves in
drugs
Fix the agreement mistake
drug
show examples
 and alcohol activities because they are defeated by their family and goals and no one is there to guide them.
Therefore
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, family is crucial to emphasise their child to Move in their footsteps in them
On the other hand
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, not only guardians are cooperative in abiding their infants but
also
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 when they get elder they
gives
Change the verb form
give
show examples
 a lot to
offsprings
Correct pronoun usage
their offsprings
show examples
 like shifting half pension and property to them and whenever they endure any
Correct your spelling
trouble
touble
Correct your spelling
trouble
parents
Use synonyms
 share their own experience to tackle it accurately. To explain it, as every individual
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 good and some have disgraded fortune that
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 do not avail success at every part of life at that moment
parents
Use synonyms
 accomplish their basic needs
igneously
Correct your spelling
igneous
generously
.
For instance
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, in Australia natives are still confronting problems
that
Change preposition
in that
show examples
 they do not have
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
independent
Correct your spelling
accommodation
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
 as they are living in
guardians
Change noun form
guardians'
guardian's
show examples
 home
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 their elder age. To conclude,
although
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 there is no equivocation that in current
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
 people become
clever
Correct quantifier usage
more clever
show examples
 than before so it's hard to trust
one
Correct your spelling
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
person. While
parents
Use synonyms
 are the best guides to make their offspring strong and successful in future

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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