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Band 3.5

Some people think children have the freedom to make mistakes, while other people believe that adults should prevent children from making mistakes. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #children #freedom #mistakes #adults
Nowadays, most
parents
 are concerned about their
children
's education.
However
, whether
parents
 should prevent
children
 from making
mistakes
 or give them the freedom to make
mistakes
 becomes a hot topic. My view is that
parents
 should give
children
 enough space so they can try something that they want. It is obvious that
children
 can benefit from
mistakes
 and learn the correct way to resolve them. If
parents
 always prevent
children
 from making
mistakes
, they can not obtain the ability to face and solve problems.
Parents
 must allow them their make
mistakes
.
However
, guiding
children
 is better than preventing them, and overprotecting
children
 can stifle their nature and creativity.
For
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
 my
parents
 always let me try something new
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and encourage me to learn from
mistakes
Correct pronoun usage
my mistakes
show examples
. Giving
children
 complete freedom is not a good way. Some unacceptable
mistakes
 can destroy
children
's lives,
for instance
, dragging, stealing, and some think like that. Keeping
children
 away from those things is necessary for
parents
. But In sum,
parents
 should encourage
children
 to try something new and not be
warry
Correct your spelling
worry
show examples
 about the
mistakes
 which their
children
 could make. At the same time, it is necessary to notice the potential of crime. Balancing them is a challenging but necessary thing for
parents
.
Submitted by harrieschen on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • freedom to make mistakes
  • critical thinking skills
  • lifelong learning
  • guided learning environment
  • resilience
  • independence
  • overprotective
  • dependency
  • problem-solving skills
  • confidence
  • negative consequences
  • learning process
  • personal growth
  • trial and error
  • balance safety and learning
  • development
  • support and guidance
  • empowerment
  • risk-taking
  • life lessons
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