Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantage of being self-employed?

#people #work #company #organization #be #case

present

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,present

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a large number of

population

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the population

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want to be self-employed without working under others. According to the growing population of the world, it is very important to be a

self dependent

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self-dependent

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person, though it

also

has a risk of

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bankrupted

bankruptcy

bank-rupted

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being bank-rupted

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To begin

with,

however

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,however

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the population of maximum countries is increasing very rapidly but the job sector is not developing compare to

this

. So, .men are trying to stand

their

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on their

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own feet,

such

as in Bangladesh, many students after completing their graduation involve in agriculture by setting

their

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up their

show examples

own fisheries or dairy firming. Apart from

this

, it

also

makes employment for other public of

this

area, which is

also

very important for the economic development of a country.

Furthermore

, working in own fisheries or firm

also

does not give

stress

Correct article usage

the stress

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of being jobless as well as other pressure

such

as time limit, target filling etc.

On the contrary

, in

case

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the case

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of setting

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up a

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firm,

fisharies

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fisheries

Correct article usage

a business

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business

Fix the agreement mistake

businesses

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need a large fund which is

also

very tough to manage.

Additionally

, after taking a big amount of bank loan sometimes people become unable to pay

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

for their losses which

also

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

them

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

bankrupt

as well as

Add the comma(s)

, as well as they,

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they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

lost their full property.

Moreover

, it

also

can create

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

availability

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the availability

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of expert manpower for a company. In conclusion,

for

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show examples

modern

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a modern

show examples

world

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,world

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it is become beneficial to become self-employed

with

Change preposition

show examples

accepting the risk and problems in

head

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the head

show examples

as well as be patient and strong to face

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

new challenges.

Submitted by amiejoyee on Sun Nov 06 2022

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

247 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

self-employed
company
organization
freedom
independence
income potential
flexibility
working hours
working location
passions
interests
decision-making
business practices
disadvantages

What to do next:

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Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantage of being self-employed?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Too much attention is given to headline-grabbing disasters like earthquakes and floods. Government should concentrate their resources on educating people about the risk they face nearer to home, which can cost far more lives.

It is often argued that children must be protected from unsuitable material on TV and the Internet by government censorship. Others say that this is the parents' responsibility to control what their children do and watch. To what extent do you think that this is true?

Some people feel that the government should regulate the level of violence in films on television and at the cinema. Others feel that violent films should not be regulated. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Even though globalization has some very positive effects, we can't forget its negative effects. What are the disadvantages and advantages of globalization?

The internet has a bigger impact on people’s lives because it is more popular than television. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support you position.