Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages

It is believed that

people

promote unity through

music

in the world, even if their

culture

is different and they are of different ranges of age. I completely agree with

this

idea.

Music

carries

culture

with itself, so when it is played in other places, the

culture

of the zone that it belongs to will be extended. It is undeniable that the border

whatever

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

will be wide, the more positive effects and the more known the

culture

Furthermore

music

is not related to a language. It is about the emotions of humans

such

as sorrow, love and protest,

therefore

music

can involve human emotions everywhere in the world.

Music

can bring

people

together from different races and nationalities in a variety of ways.

For example

people

come from many countries and different ages in a concert and they have a contract together. They dance and sing with each other,

therefore

, they make relationships through emotion.

In addition

, for making

music

, there needs to be a lot of musicians who these musicians by skills and talent in a variety of instruments that

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

are not the same are in a band and produce

music

. In conclusion, some

people

’s attitude is there is a great way to others can make a relationship without paying attention to their

culture

and age. I totally agree with

this

idea. There are many

music

styles in the world that there are a lot of nations listen to them and are connected with it because it does not matter if the language is different what

that is

matter is emotion.

That is

involved.

On the other hand

, there are some

people

who are not of the same age but like concerts and go to concerts

then

, they will be connected to each other by listening to

music

Submitted by TUTOO on Sun Nov 06 2022

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

300 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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