At the present time, the population of some countries includes relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

#time #population #countries #adults #people

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There is no doubt that investing in the population is the key to the future. Nowadays, in some communities, the number of youngsters is way higher than that of the elderly.

Although

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some minimal drawbacks may be noticed, I strongly think that

this

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is an advantageous position. Admittedly, there are a few disadvantages when considering a larger portion of young adults in comparison with older people.

To begin

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with, younger aged persons do usually lack the proper experience.

In other words

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, they did not have the chance to learn from their mistakes. To illustrate, while a freshly graduated doctor may find heart transplantation exhausting, aged doctors did have the chance many times.

Therefore

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, they become more experienced and yet more beneficial.

Moreover

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, those at the beginning of their career are often finically weak.

Thus

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, compared to the older ones, will have to face many struggles and issues.

Nevertheless

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, despite all the minor negatives mentioned above, I wholeheartedly believe that the advantages are way more important.

Firstly

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, having

such

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enthusiastic youth workers would offer a competitive atmosphere.

As a result

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, more creativity,

consequently

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, better outcomes that will benefit both individuals and communities.

Secondly

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, they are often capable of working longer hours and in harder situations. Manual jobs,

for example

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, need shaped youth bodies to operate.

Finally

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, more production is predicted, as more juniors are there.

In other words

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, when a younger part of society exists, magnificently products are usually provided. In conclusion, It is my belief that a large proportion of youngsters compared with the elderly, offer more positivity.

Submitted by hendawi.a on Mon Nov 07 2022

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

258 words

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At the present time, the population of some countries includes relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle. Both schools and parents are equally responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Charitable organizations increasingly utilize the internet and television to promote their work, a trend driven by technological advancements. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this approach, and provide your opinion with relevant examples and evidence.

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Computers are now the basis of the modern world. They should therefore be introduced into classrooms, and their programs used for direct teaching purposes. However, dependence on computers in teaching may carry a certain degree of risk to students.

Developments in technology are causing environmental problems. Some think the solution is for people to adjust to a simper life while others believe that technology itself can solve these problems. Discuss both views and give you opinion.