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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Students should be taught academic knowledge so that they can pass exams, and skills such as cooking, dressing.... should not be taught. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#students #exams #skills
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It is often argued
that
Correct word choice
apply
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what kind of education should be given to students.
Although
 the benefits of the lessons like math, literature or biology are easily seen sometimes people tend to ignore the impact of learning everyday
life
skills
such
 as cooking or dressing.
This
 essay will explore arguments for both sides of the discussion and provide
detailed
Correct article usage
a detailed
show examples
 analysis to readers. Schools must provide good academic lessons like math, history or physics but the aim of
this
 goal should not be passing the
exam
 or
get
Wrong verb form
getting
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 an A+ on their
exam
 result which won’t be useful in real
life
. The purpose should be
teach
Fix the infinitive
to teach
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to
Correct pronoun usage
them to
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 think rationally or be more precise with their past or be aware of how nature works.
However
 using
exam
Fix the agreement mistake
exams
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 could be useful to help kids to learn because
without
Add the comma(s)
,without
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 any force, they won’t be motivated to learn
this hard topics
Change the determiner
this hard topic
these hard topics
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such
 as algebra or the laws of Newton.
In
Change preposition
On
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 the other hand, a lot of successful people reached their
goal
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goals
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 because of their soft
skills
 not because
of
Change preposition
apply
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they were good at getting
perfect
Add an article
a perfect
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score
Fix the agreement mistake
scores
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 on every
exam
. School
also
 must be a place to gain the abilities from easy tasks, it might
be seem
Change the verb form
seem
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 not useful at the beginning
however
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
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 of chores have the potential to teach something. One clear example is that while doing the laundry,
Add an article
a person
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person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
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 learn how to organise and become better with their time
Change the noun form
management
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managements
Correct your spelling
management
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skills
. In conclusion, children spend most of their time in classes,
listening
Add the preposition
tolistening
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 the teacher which plays an important role in their
life
 but another option could
be take
Change the verb form
take
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 them to
outside
Add an article
the outside
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 of the classroom and help them to gain soft
skills
 which
is
Change the verb form
are
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 harder to ignore the benefits in both daily and business
life
.
Submitted by akbasmea on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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