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Band 6.5

Some people think that families have the most powerful influence on a child’s development, while others think other factors such as television, friend, music. etc. gave biggest effects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #families #influence #child’s #development #factors #television #friend #music #effects
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With the rapid change
of
Change preposition
in
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 social media, the transmission of information has become increasingly fast. Some people look upon families have the most powerful influence on a child’s development. Whereas others refer to other factors as having powerful effects on
children
Use synonyms
. As for my perspective, I am in favour of the former and the reasons will be thoroughly elaborated on as follows.
Firstly
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, parents can directly share their
though
Correct your spelling
thought
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 with their child clearly and use the words they could understand to explain.
In other words
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,
children
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 would receive the relatedly correct thought that had been
fillted
Correct your spelling
filled
 by their parents,
this
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 would help
children
Use synonyms
 follow the right way to develop themselves.
Secondly
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, kids would spend more time
accompany
Wrong verb form
accompanying
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 each other
that
Correct word choice
which
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 causes them to mimic other families' behaviour and thought what they trust without hesitation
this
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 lead to families having a most powerful effect than other factors
On the other hand
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, through television, video ,music or advertisements,
children
Use synonyms
 could be directly affected by businessmen or society.
That is
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,
children
Use synonyms
 would get various information and influences from the world. Take my experience
for example
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. When I was a child,
this
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 different image or voice have powerfully attractive to me that I cannot resist.
Furthermore
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, the idea from the advertisements made by businessmen always evoked my desire to buy the things that I did not really need but that are not suitable for
children
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, parents can directly share their
though
Correct your spelling
thought
show examples
 with their
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
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 and give correct ideas to help the
children
Use synonyms
 develop their own though. It has a more powerful influence than other factors that just give
children
Use synonyms
 various information without checking on
development
Correct pronoun usage
their development
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 themselves.
Submitted by humbeatbox on

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