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Band 5.5

The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what solutions can you suggest?

#internet #information
In the modern day
world
Add a comma
world,
show examples
 the use of the
internet
 has changed the way that
information
 is spread and absorbed. That resulted in problems that were not relevant in the past. The most concerning problems are the widespread misinformation and falling into addiction. The first large problem is the amount of false and misleading
information
 that can be found on the
internet
. As everyone has access to write anything they wish and that
information
 becomes accessible to all
internet
 users it is easy to spread conspiracies and other false claims. Many
people
 who are gullible or not
well educated
Add a hyphen
well-educated
show examples
 on a specific
topic
 fall victim to misinformation. The best
solution
 for
people
 would be to only search for
information
 on trustworthy
websites
 and use common sense to determine which
information
 can be trusted.
Also
, it’s a good idea to check a few different
websites
 on the same
topic
 to see if they provide the same
information
. Another
solution
 would be to filter
information
 and delete as much false
information
 as possible. The second big problem that
internet
 users encounter is addiction.
This
 is caused by endless
information
 rabbit holes and infinite feeds on social media. When
people
 try to look for
information
 online most
websites
 provide functions to either click on certain words to find out
information
 about a
topic
 associated with that word or phrase or an option to learn more about the same or similar
topic
. Social media platforms are usually designed to provide you with endless
information
, no matter how long a person uses it, the platform always pushes new
information
 and the more
people
 use it the more personalized that
information
 gets. A great
solution
 for
this
 problem would be to manage the time spent on the
internet
 by setting certain time limits. Another
solution
 would be to change the way that
websites
 are designed so it would be less desirable to spend as much time there. In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
show examples
information
 accessibility on the
internet
 has many problems and these are one of the biggest ones. There are ways to solve them, but
people
 have to make conscious decisions to do that.
Submitted by oimigle on

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task response
Ensure that the introduction clearly presents the problems associated with the internet and the solutions suggested. The conclusion should effectively summarize the essay and provide a final thought.
coherence and cohesion
The essay demonstrates good organization and development of ideas. However, pay attention to using transition words and phrases to better connect ideas and ensure the essay flows smoothly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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