In order to reduce crime, we need to attack the causes of crime such as poverty and lack of educational opportunities. It is enough to simply have more police on the street and put more people into prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#crime #attack #poverty #lack #opportunities #police #street #people #prison

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Some people believe that the best way to decrease the number of committed crimes is required to eliminate reasons for it,

such

Linking Words

as poverty and poor education. Others think that the better option is to increase police patrols to put more criminals in prison. My take on

this

Linking Words

is that financial problems and undereducation are the main causes of committing crimes and to solve them the governments should focus on them. Poverty is directly connected with the

crime

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rate

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. Indeed, lack of accounting liquidity doesn't provide the financial background. If someone struggles with poor finances, he or she will more likely commit a

crime

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. Individuals who desperately look for money act impulsively.

Moreover

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, they don't mind getting involved in illegal practices

instead

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of having the will to survive.

For example

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, starving people decide to steal food. Undereducated people have trouble finding a job. Illiterate communities don't meet the requirements of the labour market. In the opposite situation, when someone is educated commonly decides to seek opportunities to develop personally due to increased chances of getting work. The education level is closely connected with social consciousness. Graduates have moral behaviour and act following impeccable manners standards.

For instance

Linking Words

, the unemployment

rate

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has a direct impact on the

crime

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rate

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which could be observed especially in developing countries. They have the poorest educational system and

consequently

Linking Words

the highest number of committed crimes. In conclusion, it is not enough to increase the number of police officers to secure streets from deviants to lower the

crime

Use synonyms

rate

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. In my opinion, to achieve it, it's necessary to fix the fundamental problems behind that,

such

Linking Words

as poverty and unemployment.

Submitted by radomskaiga on Wed Nov 09 2022

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

273 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

root causes of crime
criminal behavior
legitimate economic opportunities
enhancing educational opportunities
skills and qualifications
job prospects
economic disparities
social programs
economic empowerment
police presence
deter criminal activities
underlying issues
prison sentences
rehabilitate criminals
comprehensive rehabilitation programs
community-building efforts
social services
supportive environment
discourages criminal behavior

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In order to reduce crime, we need to attack the causes of crime such as poverty and lack of educational opportunities. It is enough to simply have more police on the street and put more people into prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some people feel that manufactures and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of foods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that illegal internet download are having a negative effect on the music industry. Others feel that they have little or no impact on artists. Discuss both views and give own opinion.

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?