Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

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Public
health
is a critical issue that affects many individuals, and it triggers a debate on the best way to enhance it, As some people think that expanding the number of
sports
facilities
is necessary, others might argue that it would actually have a small influence on public
health
and that other regulations are needed.
Nonetheless
, I would say that expanding
sports
facilities
is far more superior for some reasons which are set out below. On the one hand, building better
sports
spaces would make it easier for people to exercise. Places like the gym, swimming pool, parks, and running tracks could encourage them to work out. When these
facilities
are available and well maintained, they can motivate others to make exercising part of their daily routine. Having more
sports
facilities
can
also
create a sense of community, as they come together to participate in group activities,
such
as
sports
clubs, which can motivate individuals to exercise.
However
, some would say that upgrading the
sports
facilities
may not be enough to significantly impact public
health
. They explain that other factors, namely education on healthy habits, access to nutritious food, and healthcare services, play a vital role in increasing public
health
.
For instance
, those who are not educated enough on the importance of healthy habits and exercising, might not utilize the
sports
facilities
effectively. In my opinion,
although
other measures are indeed important, increasing
sports
facilities
is the best way to improve public
health
. It is because physical activity is the basic component of a healthy lifestyle, and providing more opportunities for exercise can directly impact people's
health
. In conclusion, even though there are valid arguments on both sides of the debate, I believe that increasing the number of
sports
facilities
is the most effective way to improve public
health
as it promotes not only physical activity but
also
serves as a platform for
health
awareness.
Submitted by riani.the2 on

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improvement
Develop the discussion with more detailed and specific examples to support the points being made.
improvement
Consider balancing the discussion by giving equal attention to both viewpoints before stating your opinion.
strength
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, staying relevant to the topic.
strength
The main points are presented logically with appropriate paragraphing, contributing to a coherent structure.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • sports facilities
  • physical activity
  • exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • heart disease
  • obesity
  • inclusivity
  • participation
  • safe environment
  • social interaction
  • community engagement
  • comprehensive approach
  • health education programs
  • environmental factors
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • quality healthcare services
  • public health initiatives
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