IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Nowadays, people are able to use the internet to do an increasing number of tasks. Is this a positive or negative development?

#people #internet #tasks #development
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The
internet
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 has become one of the major necessities for
people
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 and its usage is increasing because most of the tasks can be done on the
internet
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. Some
people
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 believe that too much usage of the
internet
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 is not a positive development. I partially agree with
this
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 statement and the factors leading to my opinion are described below. In today's world, the
internet
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 is playing a very important role in human life. The first and most important role of the
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 is communication.
People
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 can now connect with anyone in the world with just one click of a button.
For instance
Linking Words
 in jobs, the
internet
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 is being used for daily meetings, to keep track of tasks, to get help to do a certain task or to work from anywhere. The
Internet
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 is helping
people
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 in each and every aspect of life.
Moreover
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,
people
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 are using the
internet
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 to share information from which other
people
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 can get help.
For example
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, on
platforms
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 like Stack Overflow and Wikipedia
people
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 are sharing information to help others. Even with all the above-mentioned benefits, I believe too much usage of the
internet
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 is harmful to human beings.
Firstly
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, waste of time on social media
platforms
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.
For instance
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, these days
people
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 spend too much of their time on social media
platforms
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 like Facebook, Instagram
and
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apply
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TikTok etc. As per recent data,
people
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 spend an average of 2 hours daily on social media
platforms
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.
Secondly
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, too much exposure to the
internet
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 is
also
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 not good for health.
For example
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, too much exposure to electronic devices like mobile phones is not good for the eyes.
To conclude
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, the
internet
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 is very beneficial for
people
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 in each and every aspect of life but too much exposure to the
internet
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 is not good for physical and mental health.
Submitted by sikander.bin.ismail on

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task response
Ensure that the essay directly addresses the task question and fully presents the writer's opinion on the positive or negative development of internet usage.
coherence and cohesion
The essay shows a good logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, some ideas could be more logically linked within paragraphs to enhance coherence.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates a wide range of vocabulary and uses appropriate language to express ideas. Consider using more varied transition and linking words to improve connectivity between sentences and ideas.
grammatical range
Grammatical range is fairly good, but some complex sentence structures and varied sentence beginnings could be used to enhance the overall grammatical range.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • revolutionized
  • unprecedented
  • convenience
  • efficiency
  • remote work
  • democratization of information
  • geographical constraints
  • overreliance
  • impulse buying
  • financial stress
  • compromise
  • data security
  • detrimental
  • face-to-face interactions
  • physical presence
  • accessing
  • engaging
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