IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Many government think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other typers of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#government #progress #people #typers #country
A section of the public believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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economic
progress
 play the most vital role in a
country
, while another school of thought peddle that, there are other
type
Change the wording
types
show examples
 of
progress
 which are equally beneficial to a
country
. In
this
easy
Correct your spelling
essay
show examples
, I will look at both sides of the argument and give my own opinion. On one hand,there are a group of people who are of the view that
,
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apply
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economic development is regarded as the most beneficial achievement for a
country
. They have
this
 opinion because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 a nation
develop
Correct subject-verb agreement
develops
show examples
 well when its economy thrives. For
instances
Fix the agreement mistake
instance
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,
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom is considered
as
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apply
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one of the most successful
nation
Change to a plural noun
nations
show examples
 with
good
Correct article usage
a good
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 economy.
This
make
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makes
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vast
Add an article
the vast
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 majority of foreigners invest their money in different companies.
Therefore
 is
of
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apply
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no doubt that economic
progress
 is actually essential.
On the other hand
, people
also
 have
opinion
Correct article usage
the opinion
show examples
 that,other
type
Change the wording
types
show examples
 of
progress
such
 as sports are
also
 important. They have
this
 view because these
does
Change the verb form
do
show examples
 not only generate income for the state but
also
 serve as sources of entertainment.
For
instance
Add a comma
,instance
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 vast majority of people show their love when watching football especially when their team or
country
 is playing with other opponents.
Correct your spelling
In fact
Infact
Correct your spelling
In fact
 it even unites broken homes. Research
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 revealed that
Correct your spelling
other
the
othe
Correct your spelling
other
 types of
progress
 contribute to
booming
Add an article
the booming
show examples
 development of a
country
. In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
 I believe both sides of the argument have their
Correct your spelling
own
show examples
ow
Correct your spelling
own
show examples
 merits,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 on balance,I tend to agree that other
progress
such
 as sports are
also
 beneficial because it doesn't only generate income for the state but
also
 serve
us
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
a
Change preposition
as a
show examples
source of entertainment.
Submitted by augesta7 on

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